Snowbaz One Shots

Reassurance

Hi there! I've been working on a bit of a longer oneshot fic, but it's not quite ready yet, so I'm going to post that tomorrow and post this one today. It's just a short and sweet one. Not much to it, just a lot of fluff. Thank you so much for reading!! :)

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Simon's POV

I can't sleep. It's nearly 1 am on a Tuesday night. I'm nestled up against Baz in our bed, listening to his gentle and steady breathing. Usually, that's enough to lull me to sleep, but tonight it puts me on edge. I've just been thinking. I've been thinking about how I'm not enough for Baz. It's been nearly two years since we became boyfriends and yet I still have the constant irrational fear that Baz is only pretending to love me. I'm just a Normal now. How could I, a Normal with wings that I constantly have to hide and a fucking dragon tail, ever be enough for someone as admirable and heroic as Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch? We've had this conversation several times before. I just can't shake it.

"Baz?" I hear myself say. The lump under the covers next to me stirs slightly. After a few moments, I hear a small grunt in response. Crowley, even his grunts are magical.

"I'm really sorry to wake you up, Baz. I just can't sleep. My brain won't shut up again." I rub my hand back and forth on his back. Baz takes a few moments to wake up and then speaks in a croaky and deep voice.

"Tell me what you're thinking, love."

I sigh and begin with, "Well. I know we've had this conversation a million times before, but..." I stop.

"But what?" His soothing voice says.

"It's just that... are you absolutely, positively sure that I'm enough for you? That you love me?"

He sighs and sits up a bit taller in the bed. He pulls me down and cuddles my body close.

"Simon. I don't know how many times I have to tell you, love. I love you and will always love you absolutely unconditionally. It doesn't matter to me if you're "just a Normal." Because, darling, you'll never be "just a Normal" to me." He chuckles slightly and continues. "Si, you are my entire life. Immediately when we first met, all the way back to when we were assigned to be roommates, my universe began to revolve around you. Never for a single moment, not even when you lost your magik, did that waver even in the slightest."

I grin slightly.

"Keep saying things like that," I order.

"Baby, my life was miserable without you. When we were just roommates, before we kissed for the first time, my life was spent entirely wallowing away in my own misery and self hatred. When you pulled me out of my suicidal mindset that day in the forest, my life changed for eternity. I had been waiting for that day for years but never believed that it would actually come. You may have saved me for real that day, but every single day since then, it feels like you save me all over again. You are, and always will be, the guiding light in my life. With a love like this, I could give a shit if you can cast a damn spell. I just care that you're Simon Snow. That's all I've ever cared about."

With each soothing word, I start to feel bits and pieces of the weight on my shoulders fly away. My eyes even begin to droop a bit.

Baz's POV

It never ceases to amaze me that we've had this conversation numerous times before yet I can still find new things to say every time. I can't believe that Simon still needs this reassurance. He's my life. How can he not see that?

I keep soothing Simon with my words for a good twenty minutes, rubbing small circles on his back. Eventually, I look down and see that he's fallen to sleep, clutching my hand, a hint of a smile on his lips. I lean down and kiss him gently.

"I promise you never have to worry. Goodnight, love."