The Disappearance of Osomatsu-san

Chapter 5: We're Friends For A Reason

The entire trip was the pinnacle of deafening, utter hell. Iyami's constant gag reactions mixed with Chibita's impatient yelling and outbursts caused Osomatsu to wonder if asking them for help was a good idea in the first place. None of this would have happened if he just chose the option of running everywhere, even if it killed him. Taking the train would have been faster, but running everywhere would be a nightmare. Good god, nothing was easy wasn't it? But Osomatsu was thankful that Chibita hadn't tried to attack him with a giant oden stick after Osomatsu explained the situation.

After Osomatsu explained everything he currently knew to both of his acquanitances, Iyami drove in silence while Chibita had told them something interesting with a sigh accompanying his words. Their Osomatsu had been a bit pissy a week before Osomatsu, the real one, woke up in his place and started sulking. Osomatsu's guess was that their little drunken piece of garbage, their version of Osomatsu, probably stumbled off somewhere as he left Chibita's oden stand drunk and probably an emotional mess. "He's a troublemaker, that idjit." Chibita murmured. "He started rambling about how lonely he was, how imperfect everything is. The hell? That idjit acted more of a brat than he already was, damn it."

"..Me isn't sure about this idea anymore." Iyami spoke up, eyeing the eldest Matsuno beside him with doubt. Osomatsu was initially worried that they wouldn't believe him and drop him off the city after thinking he played a cruel prank on them, but now, he was worried of them believing him, but not trusting him. He wasn't their Osomatsu. "This Osomatsu beside me.. it's not the Osomatsu me met years ago. Should we even be helping him, Chibita? What if he's from a dimension in which Osomatsu is some sort of murderer? What if this is actually our Osomatsu, but high on drugs?"

This was what Osomatsu was scared about. Being doubted and no one siding with him. He had spared no detail, because if he wanted their full cooperation with little to no questions asked, he had to be honest with them. He explained that he woke up on a futon meant for only one person to sleep on. He explained that the silver alarm clock his brother had bought was clean, no signs of satanic cats scratching it or blinding glitter decorating it. He explained that he received a package a week later that contained items of his little brothers, the phone in particular that could text through dimensions. Hell, he even showed Chibita his chat with Choromatsu, in which the smaller male asked why the hell did he nickname Choromatsu names like "Fappymatsu" or "Chorofappyski".

To his surprise, Chibita shrugged Iyami's suspicion off. "Idjit. Our Osomatsu isn't serious as hell, not like this guy. And drugs? Please. Guy can't swallow tablets for god's sake, and he can't even smoke. Beer's the only thing he can do right, damn it. Our Osomatsu was a lonely, spoiled brat. He'd get violent when drunk or messed with." He mumbled. "Even if this isn't our Osomatsu, he's still an Osomatsu, isn't he? I would have called the dimension-thing bullshit if he didn't back it up with legit proof, damn it. The messages on the phone are creepy. Couldn't have sent it to himself."

"Why would I even want to do that? I'm lonely without my brothers, but I'm not that lonely." Osomatsu chuckled weakly. They had been awkwardly doing this for an hour now. He wasn't used to dealing with his problems all alone. He usually had Choromatsu assuring him it would be fine. Karamatsu telling him he believed in him. Todomatsu offering pep-talk. Ichimatsu giving a pat on the shoulder. Jyushimatsu wrapping his long sleeves around his neck. Literally all his brothers were there in his darkest times. Especially after "that" incident. "Do you guys.. still wanna help me?" He decided to ask.

Chibita sighed. "Honestly? I dunno. Idjit, you're in a bigger problem than I thought you would be. Never expected you wouldn't be our Osomatsu either." At least Chibita was honest. "But leaving you out there in a world so familiar but at the same time isn't.. the hell? The guilt'll chew me out for weeks if I let that happen, damn it. I don't know about Iyami, but I'm stickin' with ya 'til you find your way back home. Besides. If you're gonna gather your brothers and the other you, we can bring back our Osomatsu home and have him cover for ya. I'm worried where that idjit might have ended up. He was drunk when he left, and his ma said he collapsed instantly as soon as he got home."