Limerence.

Forty Two.

---Forty Two---

Jasmine's pov;

I haven't forgot a single thing of what happened last night and I'm still extremely mad at Harry. He literally told me to stay with him so he can have fun and he then goes to Stacey. I don't believe what he said, that she dragged him there. I'm pretty sure he was as drunk as her and it upsets me even more.

This girl appears out of nowhere after so long as they've told me, and the thing is that Harry called her right after I told him to get a girlfriend. I didn't mean it, it sounds selfish but I didn't. I was just mad at him because he thinks he always gets what he wants, that others will do whatever he says, but it's not how it is. He's so damn arrogant and self-centered.

How he acts just makes me want to act even worse to him, even if it sounds bad.

~Hey, have you got Alex Richard's number? -J~

~Sure, why? -Zayn~

~Just need it for something -J~

~He's not the best person Jasmine, you know -Zayn~

~I'm going to be fine, don't worry. Don't tell Harry I asked for it -J~

~Okay but be careful -Zayn~

I'm happy how Zayn and I have kept a friendly atmosphere between us after I broke up with him after only one week of dating. I feel like I used him, doing this, but he understands where I'm coming from and I'm more than grateful.

Maybe if it wasn't for Harry, telling me to speak my mind when we were at Primrose Hill, I would still be dating Zayn out of fear of hurting him. I feel slightly better knowing he is okay, he knew what he was doing when he asked me to try this. Honestly, he was the best person to experience this with because he is calm and collected.

I'm happy for him that he is with Perrie now. I have known Perrie for five years and I know she is a great girl, that I'm starting to get close to. I can't understand how closed I were to myself these past three to four years, not even having an interest to meet my sister's friends.

I used to hate her when our parents got divorced, because she was so understanding that I thought she wanted them to break up. Because she's older, she always was the first to know about things like these, my parents didn't want to upset me much, because I am assumed to be the wild child in the family and I accept that term.

Jesy and I are polar opposites. Jesy is calm, polite, has a talent in music, has stable friends and a stable relationship. She loves the concept of romance and having someone to love you, to risk everything for you, like every hopeless romantic. In comparison to me. I am definitely not calm, I freak out easily, I am stubborn, I am polite but curse whenever I am extremely irritated, I'm closed to myself and I like writing more. I like to read people like open books, that's why I picked Psychology as a major.

I would never want anyone to risk their old life for me. I wouldn't want to not let someone chase their dreams because of me, I would feel too guilty after. I am skeptic about love and I would rather travel the world than stay in one place with a lover for a lifetime. Love screams boring to me. Don't people get bored being with the same person? In one point, you'll know everything about your partner, you will run out of things to talk about and that spark everyone talks about will fade away.

I don't think anyone will ever care enough for me to change my mind. I'll end up with a thousand cats alone. I'm quite pathetic, people will think I'm from another universe if they find out I don't believe in love. And I'm a girl, most girls seek that kind of affection.