we've lost touch

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I sat in my bedroom, fiddling with my fingers. The speaker was playing soft music, a song I didn't recognize. My phone sat next to me and I waited anxiously for it to buzz. I brushed my blonde hair from my eyes and huffed out. Colby was late again.

Recently, Colby has never been home. He leaves early in the morning and returns late at night. He sleeps and then repeats the process. Every time I text him, he responds hours later like he always has something better to do. And I know he has other friends but I'm his best friend. And he's been leaving me hanging.

But tonight was different. Tonight I was waiting up for him because I had to find out what was going on with him. He's barely spoken to me when he is home. And he often ignores me when I try to talk to him. It hurts my heart a little bit to see him drift away.

I laid down and sighed. It was nearing midnight and I hoped he would be home soon. I threw a hoodie over my cold body and buried myself under the blanket. I would just rest my eyes. The buzzing of a text message would wake me if I fall asleep.

The continuous buzz floated through the air and woke me up. I slide my hands around the sheets and find my phone. I was getting a phone call from Colby. I answer groggily.

"Colby?" My voice was deep with sleep.

"I don't think I'll be home tonight Sam," Colby murmured.

I sit up in bed and glance at the time, 3am. I rub my face and walk over to his closed door.

"Colby it's 3am, where are you?" I question him, slightly pushing open his door. Once looking around, I realize his room is vacant. I stand in the middle of his room.

"I'm at this bar but I'm with Brennen. I'm just gonna crash at his place," Colby spoke slowly like he had to think about his words.

"No Colby, I think you should come home," I said.

Brennen wasn't the best at taking care of a drunk Colby. The first time Colby came home after spending the night at Brennens, he had throw up in his brown locks and a massive migraine. Colby told me Brennen knocked out as soon as they stepped in the door, leaving Colby to fend for himself.

"Sam, I'm too drunk. I can't..."

"That's why you need to come home Colby," I interject.

"No like I can't see you right now. I can't be with you right now," Colby's voice was almost too soft for me to hear. But his words broke my heart. He didn't want to see me, he didn't want to talk to me. I don't know if it was the alcohol talking or because he actually felt that way.

"Oh," I whispered into the phone. I know Colby could hear how hurt I am with just that one word. I hoped it changed his mind.

"I'll see you later Sam," Colby ended with. It didn't change his mind.

He hung up and I stared in shock at my phone. My knees felt weak and I fell onto Colby's bed. My heart is thumping and I'm starting to hyperventilate. My best friend ditching me? I lean back onto his pillows, trying to stop the tears from falling. I stare at his ceiling and try to calm my breathing. I eventually fall asleep on his bed, hoping Colby is okay.

——

I dragged myself downstairs the next morning. Corey was in the kitchen and when he sees me, holds up a plate of pancakes. He pats the seat and I obey. I rest my chin on my hands and watch as he drowns the pancakes in syrup.

"Eat up, Sammy boy," he laughs. I groan and slap his arm, he knows I hate when people call me that. I take the fork he hands me and I start eating. A few moments later he's eating too.

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