Living In South Park

13

I spent a week in juvi, completely silent. I spent my time thinking of ways I could get out of this mess, and I got a way that was completely fool proof.

I spoke with my lawyer a few times, well, I didn't speak, but I met with her. She understands my PTSD, but tells me that I have to speak up for court.

Today was the hearing, and I was taken in with my orange suit and handcuffs on. I waited until it was my turn to go up and tell my lie.

"Ms. Sarah, is it true that last week you broke into a house and beat this man near death?" The dudes lawyer said. I nodded and averted eye contact. God, I'm brilliant.

"Can you tell us why you decided to beat this man in his own home?" He asked and I opened my mouth, then closed it again. I shook my head and took a shaky breath. I crossed my legs tightly so people would notice.

"Can you tell us the series of events that took place that day from your point of view?" He said and I took a breath and flipped my hair back to get out of my face. In a soft voice, I recited my lie perfectly.

"Me and my friends were just walking around town, minding our own business, when this guy shows up and calls my best friend a poor homeless fag. Of course, I get mad, and I'm trying to talk sense into him, but he's drunk. So he goes home and he leaves the door wide open. I'm standing on his porch, yelling for him to apologise, and he- he dragged me in-n. Then he- he... He tried to t-touch me... So I grabbed the nearest thing, the cane, and- and I ran to the kitchen to- to get the ph-phone..." I said and cut off because I was "crying" too hard.

The courtroom was silent, and when I looked up, most people were glaring at the dude I nearly killed. He wasn't paying the slightest attention. I'm the best liar ever.

"So you're saying you beat him with a cane in self defence?" The lawyer asked again and I nodded. "You didn't call for help?" "I was screaming. That's usually a human response to something like th- that." I said, making sure to add the distressed stutter.

"Can I call her down? I don't want her too upset, she already had Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, and I don't think this is making it any better." My lawyer said. "Yes, I'd think so." The judge granted.

She helped me back into my seat and we waited while the jury went to talk about their verdict. "Can- can I use the restroom or something?" I mumbled and my lawyer took me. I did my business and made sure my face wasn't covered in black streaks, then we went back.

"Has the jury reached a verdict?" The judge asked once we were standing at our seats. "We find Sarah Germelman innocent and Steven Shields guilty." They said and I sighed in relief. "I pronounce seven years in jail." The judge said and I made sure to cry tears if joy. I thanked my lawyer and hugged her and went to hug my boys.

"Dude!" They exclaimed as I grabbed them in a group hug. We went out for Chinese after I was given my stuff and changed clothes. Beef and broccoli tasted like heaven right now.

"Dude, are you okay? We didn't know he- you know." Stan said and I shook my head. "I'm fine. Hey fatass, pass the teapot." I said and he rolled his eyes and poured me another cup. "Thanks, man. Love ya." I smiled.

"Gay." He scoffed. "No, it's called bisexual." I snapped. "How are you fine?! You could've been raped or something!" Kyle said. I just shrugged. "At least you get a buttload of money for compensation now!" Cartman said. "Cartman, if you think I'm sharing with you..." "I'm naaaat!" "Good, cos I'm not." I smirked.

"How much do you get?" "Around thirteen thousand." I shrugged. "Whoa! Dude!" They exclaimed.

We all walked back to my place and Kenny was staying for a bit. We said our byes to the other three and went in. Dale hugged me tightly, asking if I was okay. I nodded and he let Kenny and I have some time.

"That dude didn't really touch you, did he?" He asked and I shook my head. "Nah. I'm just an expert in psychology and lying." I shrugged and fell back on my bed. "Oh god, I have missed this bed..." I said and curled up to embrace its warmth.

Kenny went and lied next to me, slowly slipping an arm around me. "Stay tonight?" I mumbled. "Okay." He said and I smiled before I fell asleep.