Disruption • P.JM

f o u r

I was frozen. Come in? The office? I have to go in? Who's in there? Are they all in there with Sejin? Is Jimin in there? Holy shit. I can't do this. I can't. Why can't I calm down? I looked down at my shaking hand reaching for the doorknob, involuntarily.

I can't stop it.

I let out a small gasp as the door swung open; my breath hitched. My hand jolted back so hard to my body, I smacked my own hip.

"What's wrong? Did you not hear me tell you to come in?"

There stood Sejin, staring at the idiot in front of him who looked like a petrified toddler getting caught stealing a lollipop. Jesus, that idiot is me. How long was I standing out here after he told me to come in? Get it together dummy.

"Sorry" I softly mumbled. "I don't think I heard you". My eyes were in a full panic mode, scanning all over the room behind Sejin. Are they in here? I couldn't really see behind Sejin, but that sure as hell didn't stop me from looking.

"Oh alright. Well, come in! We've got a few documents to go through and I'll give you the gist of everything".

I sat across on the leather sofa adjacent to his desk. It felt like hours as Sejin was talking and handing me contract documents to sign. I genuinely have no idea what he was going on about. All I could think about at this point was where I was, what I was doing here, and why I did this. 

Suddenly, his phone rang, snapping me back.

"Yeoboseyo? Ah, Jimin, what's up?".

And then my mind went into a mini panic mode. Did I touch anything while I was in Jimin's room? Did I move anything? Was I wearing too much perfume in there; could he smell it?! What if they're home now and he knows someone went in there? 

I felt my body shaking; I'm officially panicking. Why the fuck did I do this?  Why couldn't I sit my ass at home? I don't need to work; my parents made sure of that. I mean, I'm thankful; I've never struggled, never worried about a thing. So, why am I here? 

"Tina?" Sejin's voice suddenly snapped me back to reality yet again and I was ready to be humiliated and interrogated about Jimin's room. Fuck. My eyes shot up to meet his gaze.

"Ne?" I quizzed. I can almost feel how bulgingly wide my eyes look right now.

"Are you sure you're okay? You keep spacing out on me here and you're worrying me. Can you do this?" He looked genuinely concerned. Now, whether that was about my own well-being or my capability of subbing in for him these next several months is not something I'm willing to figure out right now. 

I don't need more pressure. Although, this could be my way out. I don't have to do this. I'm still not sure why I'm doing this.

"Yes, I'm fine. I'm just still tired from the flight. I've got this" I smiled as I lied right through my teeth. Why?! But before I could even interject again—

"Great! Okay, now let's get downstairs to the dance rehearsal room." He stood up and I followed as we started walking out of his office.

"What for? Am I learning a managerial dance routine?" I joked. I had to lighten my own mood before I finally exploded today. It did work, a little at least; he did give me a small chuckle. We're good, everything is just fine.

"No, we're going to go officially introduce you to the boys. Well, re-introduce you I guess. Jimin told me they just finished"

We're not good, everything is definitely not fine. I stopped, which caused Sejin to stop as well and turn to me.

"Tina?"

"Sejin" I said keeping my eyes on the ground behind him. "I don't think the boys will recognize me from the time I met them years ago, because it's been years. And I don't think Jimin will recognize me either...So, I'd really rather—"

"I told you, I didn't tell Jimin it was you. Honestly, when I first saw you now, I didn't recognize you. I mean, it was so long ago." He reassured me.

He made me feel a little bit better. I can do this. He's right. Well, kind of; I think. What am I missing here? I know I'm missing something. Maybe if my brain wasn't racked by so many different things, I might have been able to figure it out, but at the moment, I was just relieved that Sejin calmed me down a little.

"Okay, let's go."

The rest of our walk was fairly quiet. Sejin attempted to make some small talk here and there. He was always so simply calm and kind, which is miraculous considering his line of work. 

I think that's another reason why he asked me to do this. I was always good under pressure; I could always keep it together. At least, on the surface, I did. I wonder if he ever panics inside, too.

The ding of the elevator brought me to the realization that we were here, in one of the underground levels, specifically where their dance rehearsal studio was. Well, is. Their building wasn't so grand before. 

They had some much more humbling times before. Not that those should matter now. That is definitely not where they're at now. Now, they are traveling all over the world, making money at every turn, with fans screaming their name everywhere they were seen. 

That brat. He is probably enjoying it so much. Godless whore.

I stopped and noticed that Sejin disappeared, but I could hear his voice clearly.

"Guys! Come here!" Where the hell is he?

He went through the open door labeled, "Dance Studio 1". Oh my God, he's in there. Feet, I swear to God, you better move like a calm normal human being or I will chop you off with a dull blade and feed you to piranhas.

I should really see a therapist. I felt my body was frozen, but I noticed I was moving...to the door...through the door.

And here I was. Inside the dance studio. Where they were, where he was. I could see Sejin several feet in front of me. As these boys that looked like blurred colors gathered around him. Are my eyes watering? Why can't I see? As I tried to focus I saw the colors shift.

They all turned, looking straight at me.

"Guys this is going to be your manager for the time being. I want you guys to officially meet Tina." His mentioning my name sent all the chills in the world straight through my body. It felt like constantly switching between freezing and burning every few seconds. 

And then, as suddenly as my body was panicking, it suddenly went completely limp and frozen all at once. I couldn't move. He was right there, looking at me with the rest of them.

Park Jimin.

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Okay, so here I am with part f o u r. I know, it has started off really slow. But it's going to get exciting! I promise. If you bother reading this, please leave me any suggestions, comments, concerns; I like the input! Also, thanks for reading! I will try to update daily, if not, then maybe every other day. If you like it, please share (: Goodnight peeps!

-Me