Disruption • P.JM

f o r t y f i v e

Tina P.O.V.

I was appalled and confused, to say the least, by Jimin's words. So, is he admitting he still holds some feelings for me? I don't know if it was the fact that I didn't want to push my luck or my pride, but I decided not to question it. I just let it be.

I let him keep his arms around me. I let my head lay against his shoulder, concentrating on its slight lift and fall with every breath he took. I could faintly smell orange blossom emitting from his sweater and it made me feel warm. He wasn't pushing me away or making me feel bad about it, so I let myself indulge, yet again.

I laid there in my spot, stiff and unwilling to move, reluctant to do anything that would cause a shift in our harmonious position. It wasn't much; we weren't speaking or even looking at each other, but it was enough. 

Of course, my heart couldn't physically slow down enough for me to actually fall asleep. I had taken more milligrams than I was willing to let him, or anyone else for that matter, know.

But I didn't want to ruin it. I looked straight ahead and sat as I did with Yoongi while he fell asleep. However, Jimin was much more aware of my current neurological conundrum.

"You asleep yet?" He questioned quietly enough just for me to hear.

"Do you want me to move?" I asked, shooting up from his comfortable shoulder immediately.

"No—no!" He rolled his eyes, chuckling a bit, "Just relax."

He reached his arm out to mine and pulled me back to lean on him again. Letting go of my arm, his hand fell and landed on my knee. It bounced right off for a moment, presumably because he let it fall unintentionally before he remembered who he lit fall on. He hesitantly let his hand fall back again on my knee, tapping it playfully to make light of the predicament.

"You sure you don't want me to move?" I rose my eyebrows while I was staring at the hand that was incessantly tapping on my knee in a nervous manner.

"Shut up and go to sleep." The way the words bounced out of his mouth, I could tell he was smiling. I could hear it.

I sighed, trying to shut my eyes tightly and relax in an attempt to slow my breathing. I really wanted to sleep at this point, but I just couldn't. In addition to the pills in my system, I was now leaning on the man who fucked his evil ex in my bed the night before. There was nothing comfortable about this situation.

The more I thought through it, the more uncomfortable I became. What could even come from this? It didn't change our circumstances. If anything, it could only make things more awkward. I sat up carefully so that Jimin couldn't figure out how uneasy I felt. He quickly turned to look at me, wonder dancing through his eyes.

"I can't sleep." I mumbled, dodging his observant eyes.

"How much are you on? You don't even look like you slept last night. And you took it yesterday morning, didn't you?"

"I was planning on sleeping when we took off, but I had that damn call to sit through." I replied.

"Did you not sleep last night...?" He quietly probed.

"In my room where you fucked Seulgi? Or on the couch where everyone could pity me about it?" I started, sighing. "I assumed I'd sleep on this flight and since I was too uncomfortable to sleep out by the pool, I took a couple more last night to just get me through until the morning."

He stiffened upon hearing my words. I wasn't trying to make him feel bad about what he did; I was truly just making sense of the situation. Clearly, I was more aggravated by the delirium than I originally thought.