There for you [nomin]

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IT was getting bad again, the feeling of weight everyday that kept Jeno in bed came back. He hasn't gotten up since yesterday, and the warmth from his skin spread to his blanket making it seem so cold if he left. He knew it was getting bad even before it started, counting his calories again, feeling tired all the time, and distancing himself from his friends. He didn't mean to, he didn't mean to ignore them and be quiet. He wanted to feel happy, truly he did want to have fun like them. However, his thoughts and heavy feelings made him do otherwise, putting him to bed in a dark room while the sun shines outside and flowers bloom without him knowing.

All that could be heard through his room was his soft breathing and his fan that was never turned off. It was pitch black in the room, and he stared at his phone to see notifications pop up once in awhile. All of them ignored as he felt no need to answer. He felt so tired, but couldn't sleep as his body kept him awake. He hated the feeling, but it was the only way to feel comfort.

His phone didn't light up after awhile, and he slowly closed his eyes. Closing them, he felt his body rest a little, the tension in his hands leaving as he let out a breath.

Jolting awake, his phone started buzzing with an incoming phone call. He stared at it for a moment, and then saw the same at the top.

It read 'Nana.' Jeno contemplated on answering, and was hesitant as he moved his hand to hover over the green spot. He thought about what his best friend Jaemin would say to him at this time, knowing he had ignored his text for 2 days straight. He then let his hand fall back under the blanket, letting the call decline itself as it turned into a missed call notification.

He felt guilty for not answering the call, but couldn't bring himself to answer it. He just felt so burdened by the fact he'd have to talk to his best friend again, knowing he wasn't even the best at doing it anyway. He felt kind of sad now, thinking about if he distanced himself to much Jaemin would leave him. Thinking about that fact made him feel lonely, and he slowly made his whole body under his blankets, curling up into a ball in thoughts. Closing his eyes, he denied the fact that he'd be alone someday.

A knock on the door made him open his eyes, but he didn't move. Another knock, and Jeno's body still refused to move. He heard his the door open from the front, and wondered if it was a robber or his friends. He decided he'd want it to be a robber than his friends, for he'd be embarrassed if his friends saw him this way.

He heard footsteps, and the sound of a plastic bag growing louder as they got closer to where he was. He suddenly felt his heartbeat grow louder in his ears, questioning who it was.

His bedroom door was slowly opened, and Jeno felt his body tense up.

"Jeno." The voice was almost to familiar, and instantly made Jeno relax at the tone.

He heard the plastic bag, full of food he was guessing, being placed down on his floor. He stayed under his blanket, feeling the need to hide himself from his own best friend he's known for 8 years. It made him feel weak.

The boy walked past his bed, and Jeno heard his curtains being opened. He furrowed his eyebrows at the light entering through his blanket. There was a weight then that settled next to him. His back was facing where the other sat on his bed, and he was still curled into a ball. His brown locks peeking from the blanket.

"Jeno, it's time to get up." Jaemin whispers, and Jeno felt fuzzy.

He then felt a hand grab his blanket, peeling it away from his face. Jeno stared at his bed sheets, feeling Jaemins eyes on him. Slim fingers started to run themselves through his hair, and Jeno kept quiet while they played with it. Jeno then felt the others cold hands caress his cheek, and he shivered at the touch.

"Come on." Jaemin says, and stands to his feet as he looks down at Jeno.

Jeno gives in, as he's always done, and holds his hands out for Jaemin to take. Jaemin takes both of them in his own, pulling the other to sit up. Jeno looked up at Jaemin, who had a small smile sitting on his face.

"Your too skinny Jeno-ya, come on, let's go eat." He says, ruffling the others hair and leaving the room to let the other get dressed.

Jeno watched his figure disappear, feeling a small rush of butterfly's in his stomach. Jeno then felt a rush of relief, knowing the other wasn't mad at him. Getting up very slowly, he got dressed in a t-shirt and shorts. He was too lazy to fix his hair, but he did his morning routine as much as he could. Finally ready, he walks out of his room to find Jaemin sitting on his couch.

"Ready?" Jaemin asks with a smile, and Jeno nods. "I left food in your pantry, saw you didn't have any." Jaemin adds.

They both left the apartment, and got into Jaemins car parked outside. Jeno realized the other must've drove here after he ignored his call, and felt guilty for worrying him.

"You know Jeno," Jaemin starts suddenly, "I was worried when you ignored my call. You can always talk to me if you feel that way." Jaemin says.

"I know." Jeno whispers.

He felt a hand then grab his own gently.

"Then why do you never call or text me?" Jaemin questions softly, and Jeno presses his lips together.

"I just can't bring myself to." Jeno admits with his head hanging low, staring at their hands.

"Jeno, look at me." Jaemin demands, and Jeno looks up to meet his eyes. "I can't help you if you don't let me. I'll always be here, even if you ignore me for weeks. I'll show up and make sure your okay, healthy and at least try and make you happy. Even though I know you feel down in the deepest ways, I'll try my best to put a smile on that pretty face of yours. I promise." Jaemin states.

Jeno feels his heart skip a beat, and his cheeks heat up the slightest along with his ears.

"You wanna know why Jeno?" Jaemin inquires.

Jeno stays silent, waiting for him to answer his own question.

"Because I love you." Jaemin confesses and pinches the boys cheek.

Jenos eyes widen, and Jaemin laughs lightly.

"Ah so cute." Jaemin compliments, starting the car and rolling down the windows to let the summer breeze in.

He was about to back out of the spot until Jeno needed to speak his mind.

"Jaemin!" Jeno suddenly speaks, and Jaemin looks over at him.

"Hm?"

"I- I love you too."















I'm sorry for no updates on my books, I have zip zero motivation to get out of bed or do anything. I feel like Jeno rn, except my crush doesn't love me back ᖗಥ⍊ಥᖘ

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