T.W- Blood, nightmares and desperation (like talking about lose and so on) oh also death.
Summary-
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-Peter's P.O.V-
Everyone I had was gone, my mum and dad died when I was young.
Uncle Ben died in front of me and I could do nothing about it, 'with great power, comes great responsibility.'
Aunt May died in a car accident not too long ago.
And Tony, well, after the fight with Thanos things didn't go to plan. And I was alone in the world.
I was surprised in all honesty, I was beginning to realise, that maybe it was best that I didn't have a family or someone to care about me. After all, everyone I have every loved has either left me, or died, and I didn't want to put that to the test again. It also meant I could be Spiderman more, and not worry about my enemies using people I care about against me.
My time alone didn't last long, I was quickly carted away from the last bit of familiarity I had and placed into a care home. I closed off from everyone around me, thinking it would be best if no one knew about my life. About Spiderman.
A few months passed of me staying there before something happened.
Clint and Laura had come over, and they spoke to me and asked if I wanted them to adopt me. At first I was shocked, having thought they would have forgotten about me and left me where I was. Then I was scared, after all, maybe they didn't actually want me, and even if they did, what if something went wrong. Something always went wrong.
But after talking to them a little more, and having Cooper, Lila and Nathan- although he didn't really say much, seeing as he was still very young- all saying how they wanted me there. I reluctantly agreed.
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"Peter, can you come here for a minute," I hear Clint shout from where I was in my room.
I had been here for two months already, and was yet to really open up, I guess the mentality I got while staying in the care home stuck because I was yet to share anything with them. I had nightmares nearly every night, and I tried to keep them to myself, but I was sharing a room with Cooper as he was the same age as I was and always woke up when I was having them.
Sighing silently to myself I got up and headed down the stairs, seeing Clint and Laura sitting at the table, worried looks in their eyes.
"Yeah?" I question lightly, sitting down at the table opposite them, already knowing what they probably want to talk about.
They both shared a look with one and another before Clint began to speak.
"We're worried about you kid, we know it's been tough. But we're here to help and to listen, you know we won't judge you or push you, but we both know you aren't okay and we want to help you."
Guilt swells in my chest at his words, I know I should talk to them, I know I should, and yet whenever I think about it, I panic and decide I can't do it. I wish I could though, it's the least they deserve after taking me in.
"I know, and I'm sorry. I just- I'm not ready I guess. I want to tell you, I really do, I just- I can't. Not yet at least," I whisper, trying to find the right words.
I chance I look at the two of them and see them smiling at me a little, seeming to understand what I mean.
"That's okay Pete, we'll be here whenever you need to talk okay. When you're ready," Laura replies, placing her hand over the top of mine.
"Thank you," I reply quietly, knowing deep down they've helped me more then they could ever realise.
-
"Peter, are you okay?" Cooper asks quietly, crouching beside me.
I had just had a nightmare, all my family blaming me for them dying, and Tony- Tony dying. He wasn't dead, but- he didn't need me in his life right now, I knew that and I still spoke to him but he needed his family, not me right now.
This has become normal, waking up with Cooper beside me, him always asking if I was okay, and I've always answered, yes, even when I wasn't. But not this time.
"No," I whisper in a rough voice while pushing myself into a sitting position.
Cooper frowns a little before saying, "do you want to talk about it?"
I stay quiet for a moment, weighing my options. On one hand, I want to tell him and have it off my chest. But at the same time, I was afraid, maybe if I said it out loud it would become real and suddenly everything would fall away.
"It was- it was a nightmare. And everyone- everyone was there. My mum, dad, Uncle Ben, Aunt- aunt May and Tony. And they were all saying how it was- it was my fault they were dead. I- I watched Tony die and I could do nothing to stop it. I watched- I watched them all die and I could do- I could do nothing about it," I mumble, tears falling down my face as my mind reals on dream.
Flashes of blood, shouting, crying and blame swarm my mind with hate filled venom.
"Peter, it's okay, please listen to me," I hear a voice cut through the memories- no, fake reality.
Looking up I see Cooper there with concern flooding his eyes, "what happened to them wasn't your fault. And Tony's okay, you know he is, he's coming over in a few days with Morgan and Pepper. You can't blame yourself for what happened Peter, I don't know all the details of what happened to them, but I know you were young, and you couldn't have stopped it."
Staying silent for a moment I let his words sink in, a part of me will always hold the blame, will always try to drag me down and make me think it's my fault. But a new part knows it's not the truth, that I couldn't have stopped it or done anything to change what happened.
I feel lighter knowing I was able to tell him that, even though it's just a snippet of everything I've been keeping inside, I know it's a start and it was shockingly easier to tell him then I thought it would be.
Maybe- maybe I will talk to Clint and Laura, I know they'll listen and understand, and I know that won't judge me, and maybe- just maybe, it might help.
"Thank you Cooper," I whisper, meaning every word, and knowing I can trust him and talk to him.
He smiles at me, his eyes lighting up a little, "of course Peter, I'll always listen when you need me to okay."
Wordlessly I nod, not knowing what to say, but knowing I'm grateful for him.
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A/N- I've realised people seem to love requesting things to do with the Barton family, but honestly I now love writing Cooper and Peter content so it's good. Also, I hope this was okay :)
