new arrival

Parties And Endings.

I slowly walked down the stairs not to be to dramatic but each step felt like I was a bit closer to my doom. After everything that has happened and with so much still unsaid and with me still being angry and upset a party was the last thing I wanted.

"are you ready birthday girl" Hollie asked breaking into a huge smile that just highlights how naturally beautiful she is.

"not really but let's get it over with."

"oh I just love how excited you are." Hollie laughed sarcasm dripping from every word.

We walked into the living room and everyone cheered and broke out into singing happy birthday to me. I politely smile and try to not seem like I'm being ungrateful it's just that my heart just isn't in it. I looked around and all 3 of my uncles are here and my smile becomes bigger when i see uncle Ringo he's being his goofy self and singing like he was a opera star and uncle George and Paul have decided to join in and I laugh and the sillyness of it all.

Paul has decided to bring Linda which is fine as I like her but of course Heather is here and why I don't even know. Who invites someone I don't like to my birthday party?. I thought that it must of been my mum as she is that person that tries to reunite everyone and wants everyone to be friends.

I look across the room and see Pattie and Maureen standing together. It's easy to tell that Pattie is a model as she is stunning. I look more around the room and that's when I see them mum and dad. Mum looks happy and beautiful and I swear she looks like a angel and dad's there looking drunk and that's when I see the beer bottle in his hand and my heart drops to my toes. I can't believe he is drunk on my birthday after everything and especially how he acts when he is drunk he isn't exactly the nicest person.

He sees me staring at him and knowing me I'm sure my face shows the disgust. When his eyes reach mine for a second he shows shock and I assume it is because he saw my black eye but all to quickly his expression changes into one that isn't readable his walls are back up and he is in that mood where no one would even know he's capable of any emotion other than anger.

"happy birthday darling" mum says cheerily pulling my attention away from dad as she pulls me into a hug.

I pull away and look at her.

"he's drunk" I say each word dripping with disappointment and anger.

"I know sweetie he's just been so upset with what has been happening."

"he's upset?. He has no right to be he isn't the one that no one believes and he isn't the one that got hit and now has a black eye and headache. He has no right to pull this whole self pitying bullshit."

I walk away knowing that I will say something I regret if I carry on with the situation.

*2 hours later*

This birthday has been the worst I have ever had. I've spent my day avoiding dad which is easy as he's spent all day on the sofa drinking beer non stop and getting meaner with every bottle he finishes. I've also spent today avoiding Paul and that's been harder as he's trying to make amends it is just harder when the people your meant to rely on and who are meant to have your back no matter what just don't believe you.

The sunshine of my day has been uncle Ringo. He's been by my side all day just cheering me up and making me laugh and for the few minutes I forget about all my problems and I'm just a normal 14 year old having fun with her uncle. Whenever uncle Ringo made me laugh dad had to make a sarcastic remark like "oh look the princess is finally having fun".

I went into the kitchen and I was fed up and I saw a bottle of vodka sitting  on the worktop. If its good enough for dad it's good enough for me I thought as I grabbed it and walked outside and sat on my swing which was attached to a large oak tree.