new arrival

ready for help?

" dad there nothing I already told you this so please just drop the conversation as your stressing me out"

" ok I believe you that there nothing"

" finally thank goodness. im glad to know that your ears do work"

" let me see your arms please?"

" what" panic was filling my body but I was trying not to show it

" why you want to see my arms"

" just because I want to and if there is nothing there to worry about then you wont have no issue showing me your arms"

" stop being weird dad im not showing you my arms"

" and why not?"

" because I dont want to"

" stop lying its because you cant. Its because there is something on your arms that you dont want me to see"

" stop being silly"

" no im  not. The night you left to see George I went to the bathroom thinking you were there and I seen the pool of blood and now you have marks on your arms. It leads to one conclusion which scares me and I know your doing it but somehow im praying for a miracle that your not"

" well whatever it is you think im doing im now ok"

John lowered his head into his hands he was completely defeated. He just didn't know what to do

" tell him India look at him he deserves to know and he needs to as you as this needs to stop"

" George I love you but stay out of this."

" no I wont. I let you and John down once and I wont do it again. If you dont do the right thing and tell him I will"

" the right thing? the right thing for who? for dad? because it wouldn't be the right thing for me then no one seems to care about whats right for me. Your giving me a ultimatum George but did you maybe think I wasn't ready to talk about it after everything that has just happened that maybe the last thing I need is more drama"

" I didn't think of it like that"

" no George you didn't but again im having to do what someone else wants so here you d
go daddy heres my arms for you"  

India pulled up her sleeves and showed her cuts to her dad and he felt like running away when he seen what his little girl had done to herself.

India looked at her daddy her anger diminishing into shame she could see his eyes hovering over her cuts and his eyes filling with tears and she couldn't cope and she burst into tears

" im sorry daddy" and she ran off upstairs 

"Oh child be careful you nearly knocked me off my feet"

Oh great now I ran into Mimi and I can't cope with her critism of me not tonight

"I'm sorry Mimi it was a accident" I answered my tears streaming down my cheeks

"Now come on child stop all this blubbering. No need for all these tears they  will do nothing but wet your face"

" I can't help it if I don't cry I dunno what I'll do"

"What do you mean?"

I pulled up my sleeves and showed her my arms and prepared myself for her sharp tongue to tell me how stupid I am but what she did surprised me. She hugged me

Mimi hugged me.

"Come into my room I want to talk to you. Come on now I'm old I don't have all the time in the world to wait for you hurry up."

I followed her into our guest room which for the time being is mimis bedroom and I sat down on a chair she had facing the window

" I know you that you hate me"

" I don't hate you"

" you're a awful liar"

" my dad told me the same thing"

" I'm tough I know that I have had to be and I've made some terrible choices over the years and done things that I'll never be proud of. But there is one thing I'm proud of and that's my John. I brought him up and yes he was hard work oh lord the trouble he got into I swore he was going to bring me to a early death with his antics but under all that trouble and that horrible teddyboy look he had he was a good boy a troubled boy but he was a good boy. He had alot of things happen to him that he struggled to cope with. Did he ever tell you about my sister his mother Julia?"

"Yes he talks to me about her all the time and that he misses her so much but he finds comfort that I'm so much like her"

" well here's hoping you aren't completely like her and she was wild but I'm getting off topic. I would say your more like your father. He struggled to find a good way to cope with hard times and it seems your the same way. Your father dealt with hard times with drug and alcohol. I deal with them head on with fact and little sentiment with makes look like a emotionless robot but it's how I cope with things. What I'm trying to tell you is we all cope with situations differently it's your job to try and find a way to cope that won't hurt you. Like your father has put all his stress and hurt into writing and maybe you can do the same. When you want to hurt yourself again write down what your feeling and write the hurt away."

" I never thought about that thank you so much mimi"

I stood up and walked over to mimi and I gave her a hug and John walked into the room and seen them hugging and nearly fainted

" I love you mimi "

"Oh don't be silly child now away you go outta my room and let me relax"

India turned around and seen her dad looking at them and he was smiling.

India walked out of the room and towards her daddy and she hugged him

" I'm sorry daddy for everything"

" You know it made me.so happy seeing you and mimi hug and get on. She doesn't let many people see her soft side of course I knew she had thag soft side and I knew she was a softie at heart but I'm glad she showed you that side"

"Yeah she talked to me and helped me sort my head out a tiny bit and talked to me about other ways to cope she was actually a great help"

"India in sorry about forcing you to show me your arms. I was doing what I thought was best but I was thinking about it and you were right I should of said nothing and hoped In time you would of came to me"

" no you done the right thing. I just didn't want to hear it. I guess I'm as stubborn as my daddy but I'm ready to talk to you"

" love you don't have to"

"I want to. I'm ready to talk"