you'll find me here forever ➳ kol mikaelson [ the vampire diaries ]

☆ 2.20 ~ the end of the world

breathe the air again, it's a beautiful day

Kol's hand laid on top of Lydia's stomach as he held onto her hand tightly, afraid to let go but he knew he would have to soon, he could already feel the warmth beginning to leave her body. He stared at her with shame in his eyes. None of this should have happened. He should have protected her. It was his one responsibility and the only he ever took seriously, but he failed at it. He failed her. There was nothing more he wanted than to see her open her eyes, to hear her take a breath or to sit up in her spot, but she never did. Her eyelids remained closed and Kol wished he could see them one last time, but it wouldn't matter. There would be no life in them. Lydia wouldn't be in them.

i wish this moment would stay with the Earth

"I love you," The words left his lips so suddenly and so easily. So much so that Lydia was a bit surprised by the proclamation."I have loved you for quite some time now but I was afraid to tell you. I was a fool. I needed you to know. . ."

"I know," Lydia smiled up at him softly.

"You do?" Kol raised his eyebrows, a bit surprised by this but Lydia just nodded her head and widened her smile.

"I do," Lydia confirmed but she didn't explain how. This wasn't the time for that."And I love you. But I think we should hurry up. I'm afraid of a lot of things and it's only a matter of time before we see some weird spider snake clown creature show up. So I. . . I will fight to live. If it means that I get to be with you."

Kol smiled down at her as he thought about how lucky he was to have her in his life. She truly was the best thing that had ever happened to him and he wasn't about to let her be taken from him. He had some comfort in knowing that Lydia already knew he loved her. He was worried that she would never have gotten the chance to know and he couldn't help but wonder how she knew, but that would be a story for another day. When they were both alive.

some primal paradise

Kol let out a small sigh as he looked over at the water which had frozen over, smiling slightly thinking about the memory he shared with Lydia when he first found this place. Lydia was the whole reason he was now here. He saw Lydia everywhere he looked and in everything he did. But it wasn't enough. Here in their spot, he was surrounded by her. Here was where he felt at home. Being without her now was rough. He knew he had only met Lydia about five months ago, but it felt like she was in every memory of his. He felt like he had met her years ago because every moment he spent with her or thinking about her, he took time to fully appreciate it.

but there you go again, saying everything ends

"Why do you refuse to believe that she is gone?" Kol snapped back almost immediately.

"Because you are my brother," Klaus explained with a sigh."If I can help you avoid the pain of losing her, I will."

Kol scoffed and shook his head."The least you could to today is spare me of your caring brother facade. If Lydia did not keep me out of your hair these past few months you would have shoved a dagger through my heart just to rid of me without thinking about it. But we are not going to discuss that now. I have more important things to do"

"Like what?" Klaus sounded almost offended."Cowering instead of fighting for the woman you claim to love?"

saying you can't depend on anything, or anyone

"I'm sorry that you lost her," Caroline shared sympathetically.

"You lost her too," Kol reminded her.