Oh no, please, not today

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As we walk to the coffee shop, I get to know Jill better. She came from Wisconsin, the cheese state. When she first arrived here at Berkeley, she wanted to turn back around in her hatchback convertible and go back home.

Her roommate, Tana, is a real big slut, Jill's words not mine. Last night, Tana had a threesome with one guy and a girl. It went on for hours and hours, Jill hide under her covers blasting Taylor Swift's "Red" album on repeat. Even then, it didn't cancel out the noise.

Fast-forwarding through all the Tana this and Tana that, she tells me how she's lactose intolerant, ate some ice cream from the career center, and almost shit on herself in the room. She swore it said Dairy Free on the sign.

Speaking of a sign, the Coffee shop sign comes into view. The line that was wrapped around the corner only hours ago is non-existent. Now, only a few kids sit inside, mingling with each other or doing school work. Jill and I stand in line observing the menu.

"So, what are you going to get?" asked Jill. She whips out her Visa card that has Darth Vader on it.

"Just a dark roast and danish. I don't want to eat too much, my sisters making Tacos for dinner tonight." Each night, one of them cooks for the whole house. Carlee made Chinese food on Saturday, followed up by Daniel making spaghetti, which was pretty average by the way. And tonight, Bridget's making Tacos, which is the only thing she's good at.

"Mhm, sounds delicious. I'm just getting a cameral frap with two cookies. I woke up this morning craving chocolate."

We order our food and drinks, wait for 5 minutes, grab our goodies and find a two-seated table on the middle side of the café. As I put my sugar and cream in the coffee, Jill takes a huge bite out of her cookie and starts talking.

"Hey, how come I've never seen you in the dorms?" She questions, a drizzle of chocolate slides down her lip, she licks it up with her tongue, that's also pierced.

"Did that hurt?" I point to the ball piercing in the middle of her tongue.

"Not really, well at first it hurt like a bitch, but it feels like getting your ear pierced, just in your mouth. Now, why haven't I seen you around the dorms? Wait, are you one of those rich kids that bribed the dean and got a single dorm?"

I slowly sip on my hot coffee, "Hell, I wish. My parents have money, my mom is a doctor, and my dad's a lawyer. We're like The Cosby's, minus the plethora of kids."

I explain what happened, "When I sent in my application, the system shut down and they never got it. The school sent out an email talking about it, but I don't check my email."

"Who the hell sends an email. What is this, The Paris Hilton era?"

"Exactly." I laugh. "Anyway, I'm staying with my sister and her roommates until I get a room." I take a bite out of my Danish, the soft dough seeps into my mouth creating a flurry of flavor.

"Oh my god! Please tell me it's not only girls."

"No, it's girls and boys. Besides my sister, there are two girls named Carlee and Monica. For the guys, there's Daniel, Doug, and Andreas." The chocolate cookie falls out of her mouth, those grey eyes bulge open.

"Andreas Chen?" I nod, confused by why she's so excited. "The sexy Asian guy on the football team, you're so fucking lucky dude."

"Yeah." Her face is now bewildered.

"You've got to be kidding me, Eliza. Can I call you Eliza?"

"I prefer it."

She continues, "Ok, Eliza, let me tell you who you're living with. Andreas Chen is like the best Cornerback this school has ever seen, and it's the hardest position to play in football. Some people say he may be drafted into the NFL this upcoming season. Besides being a football phenomenon, he's the guy everyone wants. When I went to the showers this morning, I overheard some girls chatting about him. One said his dick was as long as a free breeze bottle, and that he's so good in bed, he sent a girl to the hospital."

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