Chapter 26| Out Of It...

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Anisha’s POV

I was outside, shivering on one of the beach chairs at the poolside. Nadeera has sworn with her life that I won’t sleep in the house today because everything that has happened was my fault, I caused it intentionally. Today I felt like I had had enough, this is too much, I know that maybe I have to work hard but it has to be both sides and Mukhtar has already chosen Nadeera and it seems like I was the scapegoat but every time I look back and remember the kind of family I came from, the kind of a father I have I will prefer this than going back home.

On the bigger picture, I was the lucky one, to the world I am the wife of Mukhtar Abdul Samad Wazeeri but to him and in my house, I am nothing other than a moron. But what can I do about it, who will want me after I have been married, with a child and several miscarriages, who will want a woman with bruises and marks everywhere?

I know that I am a sad girl, distraught and frustrated, sometimes I fight Sabrina but I know she was right and I was wrong but I can not accept the fact that she was right because somewhere around it is invalidating what I was told is right, it was something that Baba and Mama said, something that Aunt Saudah, Aunt Haseena, Aunt Raseela and all the other said, so how can all of these people be wrong and Sabrina of just yesterday is right. I am confused. I know it will be easier for anyone to judge me but no one has the right to unless you have ever walked in my shoes.

I am an eyes witness to everything that has happened to all the divorcees of my family, some of them couldn't come back home because of the way our society dealt with their counterparts while the majority managed to come home. Even though it wasn’t their fault they had to suffer humiliation and endless acrimony along with lies and selfishly fictional stories of why their husbands divorced them. Let's take Walida, Aunt Salmah’s daughter she is Baba’s sister too but they share a different mother. When Walida lost her husband to a terrible accident on his way to Lagos, she insisted on staying back at her house with her kids but her parents refused, her husband's family insisted that she should stay until her iddah period was over. Between this period only God knows the amount of baseless stories that were going around about her with another fellow during her Iddah.

After the Iddah was over, she was forced to leave her kids behind with her late husband's family and go back home and that was the worst stage of her life, there was no atom of leniency from both side, and it took a little misunderstanding for her father to flogged the hell out of her and for the mother to camouflage a curse at her, lastly, her father even accused her of being her husband murderer. He finalized it during a fight someday and it fell into the ears of a town crier of their neighbor and that was it for.

This was a woman who lost a husband, let's not talk about the ones who got their divorce letters in the middle of the day. So what of me that everyone stamped happiness and luck on me? What of me? Mama claimed that the reputation of my family depends on how firmly I hold the string of my marriage. This is not an easy task but at the same time, I am fading out of the world.

Today I thank God that I was even left outside the compound, Nadeera didn't take me to that resentful dark warehouse and make me starve for days. Probably because she was a bit shaken by Sabrina’s capacity.

Back to what happened today, it was a punch out of the blue, somewhere deep inside of me I knew that Sabrina wasn't lying, the man had touched her without her consent because this wasn't the first time they were hosting this kind of party and the caliber of the people that always attend are disgusting as Nadeera and Mukhtar's values.

I was freely serving because I knew Sabrina was out and there would be less trouble, but she was the center of attention out of nowhere, sometimes I wondered where this girl possessed this level of intrepidity. she challenged everyone and anything wrong that came her way but the worst part of it was that she didn't care if it would cause me beatings or trouble because she always believed that I chose to live this kind of life.

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