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the first day here i woke up in a strange room i do recognise it from somewhere but i can't seem to place it.

are we in America? no i think its Russia.

then i remember a few things as we arrived at this mansion.

they didn't psychically hurt me but they definitely trie to mentally.

they forced me to strip u til i was in my underwear etc. and watch as i put on some other clothes.

the second they Cavak refused to give me anything to eat because i wasn't giving him anything like sex or you know just pleasing him. he wasn't forcing me. not yet...

he trie to break me mentally by calling me a lot things. but it wasn't nothing i hadn't heard before. he really thought that he was better then River? hoe did he think that. he is weird. very weird...

he did grab my boobs an butt. he even rubbed the most private part. which brought a lot of memories back... i struggle to push that back everyday...

i try to look on the bright side and say to myself at least i had clothing on this time. but it still makes me real cheap, dirty and disgusted.

the third day came up and they started to do the abusing as in beating me ip in my room. what just a empty room with an ned in the middle it's almost not a bed tho... and a toilet. it feels like jail even though i've never been in jail.

the beating wasn't bad as before but that could just be because adjusted to the pain. anyway it was still painful but bearable.

i'm making them believe that i'm weak and then suddenly i just become so powerful.

as i thought.

it was a good idea at first but then Cavak came to my room or actually behind my jail or bars? it is sort of a jail it doesn't have a walk between the entrance so i feel like a prisoner.

i'm chained into the ground... literally.

so i had beatings. i listed to then talk about me in russian thinking i couldn't understand them. they think i'n sort of a slut to Cavak or something.

they did bring me a nurse today to make sure i don't have any broken bones.

i'm saying i'm having a better time here then when i was at my 'uncle's' and 'aunt's' how?!

a few rips are broken which explains why breathing  i could tell the nurse wanted to help me but she just couldn't and i get that...

until Cavak killed her... he said that couldn't have any witnesses. she was innocent and very nice. she maybe had an family?!

as i'm chained into the ground Cavak comes into my jail room.

"i've something very exciting." he says with an smirk.

"or actually your gonna try something, no wait we're gonna try it on you, yes that is better." he says thinking about his english?

"i'm gonna unchain you and then you're coming with me." he says and he does that and i follow him or well he holds my arm so i'm being slurred trough the compound.

he walked so fast making every part of my body burn in pain.

it feels like when i arrived at my brothers house when i needed to walk those large stairs....

we arrive in an hallway with one metal door in the end.

he knocks and says something in Russian.

he said it so fast i couldn't hear or understand it.

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