chapter 32

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Chapter 32:

I started breathing heavily, on top of whatever was going I think I felt a panic attack coming on. Partly because I was freaking out, thinking of all the negative shit that could happen, and the devastation Alex would feel. And his parents. I know how much all three of them care for this baby.

I tried to calm myself, but I couldn’t. I was shaking and all the while Alex was tightly gripping my hand, his eyes staring into mine, they were filled with worry and pools of tears. In the background I saw Ella nearly crying trying not to look at me and the state I was in, Jack was comforting her. ‘Don’t worry, the ambulance is on its way!’ Jack spoke softly trying to calm Ella down.

‘Hold on Hanley, the ambulance is coming!’ Alex’s tears fell onto my hand. I closed my eyes to avoid watching the pain he was going through, the pain I was putting him through.

It wasn’t long before i heard the sirens from outside, and soon the flashing lights reflected on the window. Jack rushed to the door and Ella followed him. Alex gave an unsure smile ‘Everything’s going to be okay!’ He backed away as two men came in and placed me on a gurney and wheeled me outside into the ambulance.

Alex hopped inside too, as Ella and Jack dove for the car to get to the hospital. ‘We’ve been told the situation, all we can do is get her to the hospital’ one man said to Alex who was trying to hold back his tears. ‘Its gunna be fine’ Alex was crying so much he could barley choke out his words.

Minutes later we were at the hospital, I kept my eyes closed the whole way through being wheeled from corridor to corridor. Alex left somewhere along the way, I nearly screamed out for him to come with me, but that would have been foolish I suppose.

---Jack’s point of view---

Ella was silently crying as we approached the hospital. ‘Ella, don’t worry, e- everything will okay’ I stuttered taking her hand. She was shaking slightly. My eyes started to water, tears of worry and guilt ran down my cheek. ‘I c-can’t believe it. After all sh-she’s been through and th-this has to happen’ Ella sniffed. ‘Shhh, just calm down okay’ I said parking the car.

We ran towards the hospital doors and came to sudden halt as we saw Alex sat on the step outside. ‘Alex?’ I said kneeling down by him. He gasped and looked at me, his eyes were red and his face was pale. ‘I needed some air’ ‘I’m gunna go find Hanley’ Ella said darting through the hospital doors.

‘Jack, what’s gunna happen?’ Alex began to cry into his hands. ‘I don’t know man, but we’ll get through this, I promise’ Alex looked up and smiled trying to believe in my promise. I gulped and looked out into the distance.

---Ella’s point of view---

I was sat on some seats close by the room were Hanley was being attended to. The doctors said I could see her soon. I was firmly holding my hands, trying to stop the shaking. It wasn’t working very well. I heard running from the end of the corridor, I looked and saw Jack and Alex heading towards me.

‘Jack!’ I rose as he wrapped his arms around me. ‘Where is she?’ Alex looked at me ‘In there’ I pointed to the room ‘We can see her soon’ I sat back down; Jack took the seat next to me keeping hold of my hand. Alex stayed standing but leant against the wall.

It was silent from then on; we were all just waiting to see Hanley, praying she and the baby were okay. I looked at both Alex and Jack, Jack was staring into space and Alex was now sat on the floor with his knees dragged up and his head resting on top.

A few doctors passed by, but none of them spoke or even looked at us. Until finally, an old looking man approached us. ‘Are you here to see Hanley?’ Alex jumped up as me and Jack stood. ‘She’s in that room there, please don’t be too long’ He smiled and walked away.

Me, Jack and Alex all looked at each other before Alex made the first move as me and Jack followed. As we came in the room we saw Hanley lying in the bed, she propped herself up as we walked up to her.

Alex ran and grabbed her hand ‘Are you okay? How’s the baby?’ ‘They said they don’t what’s wrong yet or what’s going to happen or anything!’ Jack and I stayed at the back of the room letting them have there moment. Jack’s had his arm around me; he was tightly gripping my shoulder. I looked at him in suspicion.

Alex and Hanley mumbled for a while before looking over at us both ‘Could you guys give a sec?’ Alex looked his eyes flicking from me to Jack. ‘Sure’ Jack dragged me away before i could say anything, I hadn’t even said hi to Hanley yet.

---Alex’s point of view---

Hanley was staring at me, like she knew something was wrong but wasn’t telling me. ‘Look, if anything’s wrong you can tell me? I can take it’ I chuckled slightly. Definitely not the right time. ‘Nothing, I don’t know anything, literally’ she rolled her eyes.

 I didn’t get what she meant but I didn’t care about that. I leant and lightly pressed my lips on hers for a moment, I broke away and she smiled.

The door suddenly opened and a doctor came in ‘Hanley, we have some rather unfortunate news’

Hanley grabbed my hand and nodded for him to continue ‘We’re not certain but, it’s a good possibility your baby may not survive’ Hanley began to sniff, I couldn’t speak or move.

‘We don’t know much right now, so please don’t get too upset, however it is still possible for you to take the paternity test if you wish’ her grip suddenly went loose and her hand fell to the bed.

‘A what?’ I looked at the doctor. ‘The paternity test you requested for earlier today, maybe it was insensitive to ask if you still wished to take it’ I looked down at Hanley, I’d never seen her more scared in my life.

‘I guess I’ll get back to you on that then’ the doctors said leaving the room. ‘What does he mean a paternity test?’ I whispered. Slowly, tears began to fall down her face.

---Hanley’s point of view----

Fuck. It was over, Alex was going to find out everything and kill Jack. Then Ella would kill me. I didn’t dare speak, I was in a trance. This whole situation was unreal and just wouldn’t have happened to me. Yet here it was, happening before my very eyes.

‘Hanley!’ Alex yelled and I jumped in fright. ‘Why would you need a paternity test huh? It’s not like you’ve slept with someone else, you would have told me right? Rather than just going along with letting me believe I’m the father.’ I didn’t reply. I literally couldn’t. My lips were quivering at just the thought of what was going to happen.

‘I am the father right?’ he paused. ’Oh my god. I don’t fucking believe this. I don’t believe you! Hanley I thought, I don’t know! That you weren’t that kind of person. Who else could it be then?’ I looked at Alex, he looked furious and hurt.

He glared at me, tears streaming down his cheeks, he clenched his fists and stormed out. At that moment I cried out and didn’t stop. I’m a terrible person, I kept thinking. I fucking hate myself, my life, who I’ve become! I grabbed my head, stuffing my face into the pillow and continued screaming. 

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