Fire and Flame [Iroh II x OC]

Chapter 8: What mistake?

Saira's P.O.V

I knew Li's behaviour was because of the alcohol he drunk, so I didn't take it serious what he told me this night. To prevent such incidents, I decided to head to the Northern Watertribe, since the mother ship was repaired. I decided to take over both night shifts because Li was still sleeping and I wanted him to rest since he had to lead the crew. As I walked up to the deck, to start my shift, I found Haku sleeping on the deck. I shook my head and walked to him to wake him up. "Huh? What are you doing here Saira? I thought you were sleeping.", he asked. "Well, since Lieutenant Li isn't able to do his shift, I decided to do it. How about you?"
"I am doing his shift."
"Aha, can totally see it. Take rest."
"You can't give me orders."
"Since there isn't any higher official present, I'm able to give you orders.", I said with a strict voice. Haku just grinned:"You wouldn't be that strict with Li."
"Because he is higher than me."
"Is it because he is higher than you or because you like him?"
"What do you mean by that?"
"Is saw you two."
My heart just dropped.
"Li didn't know what he was doing. He was drunk", I stated with burning cheeks.
"Lady Navigator, I have known Li since we were children and let me tell you something. Li was honest with his statement."
"What are you trying to tell me Haku?"
"I'm trying to tell you that he really likes you."
"You should go to sleep, Haku. You don't know what you're talking about.", I said harshly and blended, the rest he said, out.
At some point of my shift, I closed my eyes.

"Saira! Saira! Come to me...", I heard a mysterious voice whispering. I followed but suddenly I felt something soft under my boots. As I looked down, I nearly collapsed. I was walking on dead bodies. Suddenly a little girl who was laying amongst the dead bodies was speaking to me. Her right eye closed and her skin burned and full of blood. I thought it was a genocide first. But the people looked different. So it couldn't be. "It's your fault Saira. Why didn't you save us? You let us die!"

I opened my eyes. I was sweating. It was just a dream? It felt so real. The girl...what did I do? What am I going to do?
"Had a bad dream, Saira?", a voice raised behind me.
I jumped as I heard the voice. I wiped my sweat away and tried to look as if nothing happened. Then I turned around:"You're supposed to be in bed, Sir."
"I was also supposed to take over the first shift."
"You were unwell, so I decided to take over yours, Lieutenant Li."
"Tell me about it."
"About what?"
"Your dream."
"There's nothing to say about."
Li sighed. "I guess you're better now, Sir?"
"Indeed. Yes, I am. I hope, I didn't misbehave with you."
I let the words and touches run through my mind. "No, you didn't,", I said," but you should seriously stop drinking alcohol that heavily."
Li just sighed and nodded. He took over the second shift and asked me to rest.

I couldn't sleep the few hours which were left. I had the same dream and the same part appeared again and again. I didn't know what it meant.

Iroh's P.O.V

I took over the second shift because Saira took over mine. As I reached the deck, Saira was standing still. Suddenly she gasped. I guessed she was sleeping. As I spoke up, she jumped. My thoughts were right. She didn't want to tell me what was wrong but I could see the shock and concern in her eyes. We stood there for a while and talked. Saira suggested me not to drink that much. What she didn't know was, that I was forced by her beloved friend to drink until I couldn't anymore and beyond it because he told me that he was going to tell her who I really was.
I told her to take rest, since she took over my shift. She just agreed and walked off the deck.
A few hours later the sun began to rise. I breathed in and enjoyed the new energy. The crew woke up slowly and was very noisy.
I then walked up to tell the captain that his shift was over. But I found Saira instead of him. She was focused at the sea and didn't notice me:"Where's the Captain?" "He is at his dormitory. Since his shift is over and the other Captain fell sick, I decided to take over his."
"I hope you know that you don't have any rights to give my men any orders."
Still not looking at me, she answered:"I'm very well aware of that, Sir. I just suggested him my idea. So theoretically I didn't give him any orders, Lieutenant Li, he just agreed on my suggestion."
I sighed. She was right and only wanted the wellbeing of this fleet but I had the feeling she only focused on work and nothing else. Not even  on herself. She barely touched her food. I still wondered how she managed not to look tired or stressed. When I asked her to come down and eat she refused, telling me she had to take care of the route. So I decided to bring her breakfast, only then she agreed at eating and that while guiding the ship.

Three days later, we finally reached a small island of the Northern Watertribe. As we docked, we were surprised to hear nothing. It was calm, only the water was beating against the piece of country. I decided to take Saira and Haku with me since they were the best firebender and I believed they could defeat any enemy. As we walked further, Saira noticed something. It was blood on the ice. I've never seen Saira that nervous. Suddenly we found a body. It was laying in a blood lake. Saira felt the man's plus and shook her head.
"What the-" "Please mind your language Haku.", Saira interrupted him. A whole village was burned down. Dead bodies were laying all around. Haku and I were shocked, while a tear ran down Saira's rosy cheeks.
"It's all my fault.", Saira shook.