That One Song

Chapter Twenty Four: Where were you?

~Lauren's P.O.V~

We drove up and parked at the waffle house. The last time I had been here was my 13th birthday. With my mom, dad and brother. That was one of the best memories I had with them. 

Oh how things can change.

Katy glanced over to me. She noticed I was thinking about something, something sad.

"Hey are you okay?" She asked looking concerned.

"U-uh yeah I was just uhm thinking' I stumbled.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't of taken you here" She said with sadness in her eyes.

"No, its fine" I fake smiled. I didn't want her to worry.

"We can go somewhere else? I really don't mind. It's my fault for choosing this place and making you sad" She explained.

"Wait how do you know this place makes me sad?" I asked

"Well you went pale, and when you turned thirteen" She answered.

"Uh wait ho-how did you know about that?" I asked looking confused. A surge of pain shot through my mind.

"Lauren, I gave you up to Helen and Joe, but it doesn't mean I didn't want to hear or see you again. It hurt me so much and I always asked how you were. I love you Lauren and I've never truly left you." Katy stated with tears welling up in her eyes. 

Her answer blew me back. She knew how I was? She knew me and I didn't know anything about her?

I swallowed back my tears, confusion and anger.

"I'm sorry Lauren"

Tears streamed down Katy's cheeks.

"I lost you after the accident. I loved them so much and it just, just killed me. I tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't talk to me! How many times I tried but he just pushed me away! Then I came to find you, and here we are" She explained. 

I took all of what she said in. My hands were in my sleeves. My nails scratching my wrists, the feeling I hadn't felt in a while. I felt my wrists burning as I tried to say something to her.

"I needed you. I needed a mother. I needed someone to tuck me in bed every night. I needed someone to hold me tight while I cried. And you wern't there. No one was!" I cried.

"Where were you!?" I shouted and bursted into tears. 

Katy also couldn't controll her tears.

"I hate what I did! You dont think I wake up every morning missing you? I hate myself! I absolutly do! And if I could go back and change things, I would! I wouldn't of given you to another family, I would've kept you, and loved you the way I still do! Do you not see how much I love you? You're my baby Lauren, you're my daughter and I will fight to the death to have you back! And I am so, so sorry!" Katy broke down in a pool of tears. 

"I'm sorry" I stumbled.

"I'm so sorry. I know you did what you had to do. I shouldn't be blaming anything on you. I'm sorry" I cried as I realized it wasn't her fault.

"I dont blame you for being angry Lauren, I would be if I was you. I have no right to just come into your life and be there, I wasn't there for you before, not how you needed me anyway, but I'm here now, and I dont plan on leaving, I love you so much Lauren, you are my world and I will do anything for you." She explained as she wiped her falling tears.

We'd been in the car for about half an hour and while we had been talking it had started raining and the car had steamed up. 

"Thankyou" I replied as I gave Katy a hug.