TMR / TBS Imagines 2

Newt // Incurable *REQUEST*

* This was requested by XxGraceLunaxX

WARNING: possibly triggering so just read with caution *

For as long as (Y/N) could remember, she never felt this hopeless. Even waking up inside of a cage taking her to a field filled with only boys was better than this. She just couldn't do it anymore.

The final straw was losing Winston, physically and in the manner that it happened. Of course losing a Glader was absolutely heartbreaking, but losing him to a disease when we were told we were immune was earthshattering. A million thoughts ran through her mind but one stood out: what would happen if she got the Flare?

She knew it was incurable since that was the entire reason her and her friends were thrown into that maze in the first place. She also knew it was painful, both mentally and physically. It was agonizing to feel your body tearing itself apart but how would it feel when her brain would be slowly eaten away until she was a brainless monster out for blood. She didn't ever want to find out.

What she really wanted was to be back in the Glade. She missed her friends, the mundane life of gardening every day, all day until it was time for a meal or to go to bed. She missed having stability, somewhere that wasn't a constant wonder of 'maybe I'll die today'. The maze wasn't a picnic, but it was better than this.

"(Y/N)?" A soft accented voice came behind her. She had left the group after hearing Frypan's confession over missing the Glade. She did too but she didn't want anyone to know. Newt hated the Glade, he has a limp as an example, but she didn't and she couldn't tell him the truth.

Newt didn't say anything else as he sat beside her on the ground. He could see her hands moving wildly in her lap so he took one of them and linked their fingers together, hoping it would calm her down.

He knew of her worries and fears more than anybody. He knew she was scared of the cranks but wouldn't admit it and he knew she was tired of seeing her friends dying. Newt just couldn't figure out how to get them all to live.

"If I were to be bitten by one of those bloody cranks, would you kill me?" Newt's head darted towards hers, absolutely baffled by the words that just came out of her mouth. He had never heard her speak so hopeless before.

"Don't talk like that. I won't let you get bitten by one of those things," he promised but that wasn't good enough for her.

"But what if it does? Would you kill me?" She pressed further, wanting a yes or no answer. She had been thinking about Winston and didn't think she could do it herself. Sick or not, she didn't know if she could put a gun to her head and pull the trigger. She needed to know that if it happened, someone would be there to do it for her.

Newt didn't want to answer nor even think about something like that happening to them. He wanted to live in denial and pretend that nothing bad would ever happen to her as long as he lived. He was her protector and that included this damn virus.

She heard him take a shaky breath and squeezed the hand she was holding. She knew that it was a hard question but she needed the answer.

"Only if there were two bullets."

(Y/N) hated the answer so much that her heart dropped in her chest. She wanted him to say yes, which he did, but she wanted him to go on and live his life. She was a hypocrite though because she knew she couldn't live without him either. She just prayed to everything above that that day would never come.