AWRY LOVE [1 & 2]

*43*

LARISA'S POV

Another knock comes from the door but I just stayed rooted by the window watching the gate. I promised myself I won't open the door for anyone except Anthony. I feel safe around him than anyone else.

"Darling it's Sahara, Anthony's mum." A soft but loud voice said. But I kept quiet. I'm scared to open the door. I'm really scared, maybe she let them in or something. Maybe it's just a prank. I rub my arms against each other watching the door closely.

"Darling, can I speak to you?" I completely ignore her, feeling bad and guilty for being so rude to Anthony's mum. But I feel extremely unsecured. The Beast can do anything to have me back. I know that.

Hearing the sound of the gates opening. I quickly took my eyes off the door and look at the huge gates through the window being opened.

I noticed as the guards bow while the car passes. Anthony is back. I sighed in relief. He could help talk to his mother, that I need space.

Demian's touch still affects me badly. I scrub my body so hard that it turns red everytime I finish bathing. I always cry in the shower feeling disgusted of myself. I couldn't let him go, I couldn't push him back. Memories again suddenly rush back. My eyes becomes blurry but the knock on the door stops every dirty thoughts of mine.

"Hey? Precious? I told you I'll be back. Open for me." Anthony's voice that calms my nerves says. I got up and made my way to the door, unlocking it. Anthony gives me a sad smile. "Why did you lock yourself, precious?" He asked stepping forward then touches my jaw but I flinch from his touch. The memories of Demian messing with my mind.

Anthony frowns at my reaction. Then steps forward again, making move back. "Precious? Are you okay?"

"Huh, yeah. Just don't touch me." I'm disgusting! I'm a slut!

His frown deepens as he steps forward again. "Larisa? Precious are you okay? Did something happen?" He asks with worried eyes.

"Can I please have space? On my own?" I asked not wanting to feel more guilty. He stands infront of me and rest his hands on my shoulders making me flinch back, but he puts a strong hold this time. He bends to my level and narrows is eyes at me.

"Now look at me." I still kept my gaze on the ground, too scared to look into his eyes and feel more guilty than I already am. "Look at me." The sound and deep scary voice makes me quickly look up at him. "Now explain to me what's wrong?" He asked with sad eyes. A single tear falls down my cheek.

"I'm disgusting."

"What?" He said looking confused.

"I'm disgusting okay. I'm a slut!! Look at me!!! Don't I behave like one?!"

"Larisa!! What the fuck are you saying?!"

"I'm saying!! I let him touch me!!! Okay? I let him touch me." I said more tears dropping from my eyes. His hands loosen from my shoulders as the room fills with silence but my silent sobs were heard.

"I know you well enough, Larisa. You wouldn't give yourself to someone without a fight." He said after letting go off my shoulders and starts pacing around. " It seems like one person. Just because of one doesn't make you disgusting or a slut. Okay? Never call yourself that again. Never!" He said in anger.

"I'm sorry. I just feel ugly, disgusting." I said wiping the tears but they don't seem to take a break. He stands infront of me once again putting his hands on my shoulders.

"Larisa, you never told me why I got you in that wedding dress." I felt numb, frost not knowing what to say.

"I-I need to take a bath." I said and moved back, then ran to the toilet, locking it shut.