I was a tomboy. I know some girls like to wear makeup and wear dresses and things like that. But I wasn't like that. My hair was cut short, But I liked it that way. I wasn't keen on wearing dresses or makeup like other girls. I always got bullied for it because people would call me a boy. I was really depressed about it and when I turned 19 I was diagnosed with depression. But Charlie my best friend didn't know that.
He just saw me as this happy go lucky girl that never felt sad and was always optimistic about life. But I knew I couldn't keep up that act forever. One day Charlie texted me and asked if I wanted to hang out. I accepted and grabbed one of my t shirts. It was a guys nirvana t shirt. I grabbed some shorts too and walked over to Charlie's house. On the way some girls dressed in designer outfits looked at me walking by before giggling. "Omg I thought that was a boy. That's so unattractive." One of them whispered. I tried to shake it off but those words stuck with me. They shook me to my core.
Tears drenched my face in a matter of seconds. I tried wiping them away but they just kept falling. I kept wiping them away because I didn't want Charlie to see me crying. I wiped them all away and knocked on Charlie's door. "Hey yn!" "Hey Charlie!" I forced myself a sweet tone of voice. Charlie invited me inside where we played video games and we ordered a pizza. But I just kept thinking in my head about those girls. They called me "a boy". My eyes filled with tears again just thinking about those stinging words. I didn't even notice my tears falling until Charlie brought it to my attention.
"Yn are you okay?" I immediately wiped my face and nodded and smiled. My face burning with humiliation I couldn't even face Charlie. The last thing I needed was to cry in front of him. He put his arm around me. "It's okay yn you can tell me." I eventually gave in and cried into Charlie's shirt not wanting to face him just yet. "These girls.....they said that I looked like a boy and that I was unattractive while I was walking to your house. They didn't say it to my face but they whispered it when I walked by."
Charlie rubbed my back. "It's okay yn. Don't listen to them. I think you're beautiful." I blushed hard enough for Charlie to notice. But even though his words were comforting, I still felt really sad. Later that day when I went home I just laid on the couch not wanting to get up or do anything. My depression flared up and I didn't even have the strength to take my anti depressants. So I just laid there crying softly to sleep. But before I could fall asleep, I heard a knock on my door. I went over to it and answered it. It was Charlie.
"Hey yn. I just wanted to see if you were doing ok?" But Charlie already knew the answer. My eyes were puffy and red from crying and I had tear stains on my cheeks. Charlie hugged me tight as I ushered him inside. I started crying in front of Charlie and I felt so embarrassed because of it. I mean of course he knew I had depression but I don't think he was prepared for this. He cuddled me until I calmed down. "It'll be ok yn." He whispered in my ear. "Like I said..I think you're beautiful...... and I also think..... you're ticklish!" Charlie tickled me so I would start laughing instead of crying. I laughed till I cried. "Stop....it.... Charlie! You..... stop!" I laughed. He finally did and he suggested he could order a pizza for us.
He did and we ate it while watching tv. "I love you yn." He said ruffling my hair. "I love you too Charlie." He kissed the top of my head and somehow I just felt.....safe.
For you:
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