This one isn't like sad or anything just Sirius thinking he has to put effort into everything he does.
On the shorter side.
Word count-824
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Sirius had always been told all his life to put some effort into things he does and he's tried and tried but he's always felt like a failure.
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"Sirius you really need to put some effort into quidditch were doing good but um- it's just you seem not there, if that's how to put it" James said "If you need a break tell me I'll be fine with it"
"No no James I'm fine" Sirius indeed was not fine, he was struggling mental as it was and being told 'put some effort into something' was not helping. "I'll just put some effort into it like you said"
James nodded "Alright"
Sirius was already drowning in schoolwork and now he'd have to step up in quidditch. He groaned and sat his head on his desk, almost spilling his ink bottle over his essay.
"Be careful," Someone said from what seemed to be behind him.
Sirius sat up, it was Remus "Oh, hi"
"Hi" Remus bent down, looking over his essay "You're almost done I see"
"Yeah but I can't get down a few things nor did I listen to most of it" Sirius said
"I'll let you copy off mine, the least I can do" Remus rummaged through his things and then handed Sirius his essay.
Sirius reluctantly copied, with all the talk of effort he felt like he was just mooching off of his boyfriend. "Thanks"
"Anytime" It was silent for a bit, just scribbles of quill and then James entered being loud as usual.
"Guess who made Evans laugh!" James said
"You?" Remus asked
"Damn right, I think she's starting to like me" James seemed so great with himself, he turned to Sirius "Still working?"
"Yeah" Sirius mumbled, at this point he just wanted to lie down and pretend he didn't exist.
Peter barged in a few moments later and simply laid on his bed, shutting the curtains he seemed to be done with everything as well.
Sirius finished up and rolled up his and Remus's parchment before handing it back and shoving his in his bag. He laid on his bed as James droned on and on, wanting to buzz it out he cast a Mufflito and drifted off. He woke up in the middle of the night thanks to a nightmare, he looked around and he hadn't woken anyone up somehow.
Sirius didn't sleep the rest of the night, effort he had none at this point he gave up on a lot that day and slept only to be woken up by Remus.
"C'mon you gotta get up" Remus poked and prodded him
"No" Sirius groaned and pulled the covers over his head
"You have to do something today eat and shower at least please" Remus said
Sirius finally sat up, he glanced at the clock, lunch was already over and he didn't feel like waiting till dinner. "Fine but I'm dragging you with me to the kitchens"
"Fine by me"
The walk down was mostly silent, Remus had so many questions but kept them to himself momentarily.
The house elves rushed out once the two walked in "What would Masters like?"
"The usual" Remus said
The elves knew exactly what this was, the boys favorite foods and of course chocolate. They went back and ate in the common room, Sirius seemed to do better if it was just them.
"You good?" Remus asked "You've just been a bit off"
"I'm fine Re really" Sirius said
"I'm your boyfriend I know when something's up" Remus pulled him close "You can always tell me"
Sirius sighed "James told me to put effort into what I do and I just.. I've been told all my life to put effort into things and now I feel worthless since I haven't done much and now I think I've lived up to no one's expectations"
"Sirius, listen to me now, you've done nothing wrong, you've put effort into things you really have, James is just being encouraging as you know he's super into the sport and all. So what if you've been told this all your life I don't see you as worthless I see you as my boyfriend who puts much effort into anything as he can" Remus said
Sirius felt tears beginning to spill "Y-You mean it..?"
"Of course, why would I say anything bad about my amazing boyfriend?"
Sirius now hugged him feeling immensely better, having someone who cared for him while his family didn't. "I guess I'll go take that shower now"
"Do whatever you want, I won't tell you off"
Sirius smiled and went upstairs "I love you" he said as he walked up the stairs.
"Love you too"
After that Sirius put in as much effort as he wanted, and his overall mood improved.
"The hell you do to him?" James asked
"Gave him all the love he needs," Remus replied with a grin.
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Hope this was enjoyable, remember y'all worth it :]
