The Phlebotomy Professor (Teacher x Student || Intersex)

30.

Unedited

Novalie:

I continued to stare down at Sage as she slept in my chest. After she broke down, she cried as if she hasn't cried in a long time. It was like she was holding onto all of this pain and it finally projected. She didn't say a word, just sobbing until she fell asleep which was a few hours ago. I've just been watching her, watching as she drooled onto my chest as she continued to cling to my stomach.

I didn't want to push her to talking about what was going on. I wanted to wait until she was ready. I wanted her to feel comfortable enough to tell me without me pressuring her, but I couldn't help but worry either.

What happened to you, baby?

Sage grunted slightly, her eyes slowly opening and she looked around before looking up at me. She sat up abruptly and wiped the drool from her face causing me to smile sadly as I sat up.

"Hi.."

"Hi." She cleared the sleep from her throat and rubbed her eyes before looking up at me again.

"Are you okay?" I asked. She nodded slowly and swallowed hard as her eyes drifted from me to the ground. She cleared her throat again and I handed her my glass of water and she chugged it.

"Are you hungry?"

"No." She responded quietly and I bit my lip as I tried to figure out what to say.

"I know you-"

"Do you want-"

We both chuckled awkwardly with concerned eyes after our words overlapped each other's. She scratched the back of her neck and I looked down at my hands while twirling my fingers.

"I know you have a lot of questions."

"I just want to make sure you're okay. That's my main concern." I responded back causing the tears to well in her eyes as she cleared her throat again.

"I'm..not. I haven't been for a very long time, and um..I guess it's part of the reason why I've stayed to myself for so long. Even with Brooke it's just..before you she was the only person I had and I kept it that way for this exact reason. She only knows about my issues because when I was seventeen she found me ready to jump off of my high school building-"

"Oh Sage!" I gasped as the tears welled in my eyes. She just sighed and ran a hand down her face before looking up at me with an exhausted look.

"I know that doesn't answer much about what happened for me to have these..episodes but I just wanted to give you a little background I guess.." Her voice was quiet and shaky and it caused me to move closer and grip her hand.

"You tell me whatever you're comfortable with me knowing." She nodded at my words before whimpering slightly as she looked down at our joined hands.

"But what if you leave me, too?" She sniffed.

"Why would I-no. Of course not. I showed you all of my dirty laundry, Sage. What makes you think I have any place to judge?"

"Because my last ex did. She just threw it in my face like it was nothing! Like it was laughable!" She argued as she looked up at me with desperate eyes.

"Sage..can't you see that I have a heart? Huh? I would never do that.."

"My mom was a prostitute and it's how she got pregnant with me. After I was born it's what she did to keep the bills paid and for us to eat..when I was sixteen-" Her voice started to shake again and I felt my tears build again as I continued to grip her hand.

"When I was sixteen..she had a client and..I don't know what happened because she used to always tell me to stay in my room with the door locked when the men were there..she never wanted to waste money on getting hotels and stuff so she used the guest room as the room to do stuff in and I heard a loud scream. I guess they were arguing and the door flung open and he um..he chased after my mom because I remember hearing the heavy footsteps and next thing I knew it went quiet...so quiet. That quiet that scares you. The quiet that echos when you know something bad happened to cause it.

I thought he had left so I opened the door to check on her and..and she was just laying there. I remember only seeing her feet from the doorway so I ran to the kitchen and she was laying in a puddle of blood. It was leaking from her head and I panicked. I started screaming for her to wake up but she didn't move. I knew she was dead because her eyes were wide open and her pupils were dilated. And then I heard him down the hall. He started to scream about money being wasted and he came for me, pulling me up by my locs and saying it was my turn." She was full blown sobbing again and I pulled her to me as I cried with her.

"What did he do?" I asked quietly and she wailed as she held me as if she was afraid I'd slip away. Her entire body was trembling and my shirt was bunched up in her hand as she held onto me. It scared me what the answer would be, hoping and praying that it wasn't what I thought it was.

"The question is what didn't he do.. The tattoo I have on my chest? It's to cover up the cigarette burns he trailed on the side of my breasts and rib cage. I don't even want to go into detail about the rest. I physically can't stomach it. Just know..I wanted to die. I wanted to die with my mother that night. I went to live with Brooke after that. I told her everything and she helped me deal with it but it wasn't enough. At eighteen I joined the military in hopes that it would help. That it would structure me to stop being so weak..but it didn't. It just made it worse."