Change (evansson story)

Chapter sixty one

Trigger warning ⚠️

Novas POV

Eventually Lizzie got up and took me with her inside where Scarlett was putting pasta into bowls. And it's my favourite kind the cheesy kind. " come on grab a bowl so we can eat" Lizzie said taking her own and sitting in the corner with rose. I joined them and Scarlett did shortly after too. " aw look at this little family thing" I said and Lizzie glared at me while Scarlett blushed. " is the pasta okay?" Scarlett asked everyone but she was looking at me and I nodded. I love a good bowl of pasta it makes me happy so why would I say no. Lizzie was stuffing her face and rose was eating normal. Now Lizzie had been in Washington for the last 3 days for some press. Now she's back for a few days but her house is still getting done which means I can't stay over because of construction. It's crap but I've managed 3 days so far. Well kinda 4 I guess.

I'd been texting with my dad and he's made me promise to behave. There was a new food place that had opened and I really wanted to go. All of my friends had gone and they'd said to me it's the best place to eat. But Scarlett and I aren't talking and I'm not sure if my ass is grounded or not. Yes According to my father she has that right. She had it before too so I'm not shocked. Actually so does Lizzie but she never punished me she lets Scarlett do that for her.

So I went downstairs but what I saw was Lizzie, Scarlett and rose playing a board game. I just watched them all having a nice time. I hate doing this to myself because then I feel bad for myself but I dunno what to do. It's a lot and I'd have loved nothing more then to play with them but they didn't ask me. But when that thought was done Lizzie looked up and so did Scarlett " novie come play" Scarlett said and I nodded maybe if she thinks I'm participating with them all she may let me go out. " okay" I said taking a seat next to rose and opposite Scarlett. I saw Scarlett's face light up and her smile which makes me smile. I missed her smiling because of just me. It's a nice feeling making someone smile. " okay so we just started so you can jump in. that's if you don't think you'll lose" Lizzie said and I rolled myself yes " you're trash talk needs work olsen" she laughed and out her cards done. It's monopoly card game which is fun's nd I never win at. I'm usually just playing to make number higher.

We played and as we did that I was winning. Scarlett's turn and she needed a price of me now I could give it to her or I could refuse deal " novalie" she said and I looked at Lizzie. I could just mess Lizzie's game up if I give it she comes last. And we'll Scarlett's giving me puppy dog eyes so I sighed and handed her it. She smiled wide and ended the game there. Yes I'd let her win. But she's happy right now and it felt like the old times. " not fair that's cheating" Lizzie said and Scarlett came closer to me. She put her arm around me and pulled me into her " oh please don't be a sore loser" and I couldn't help but smile. Lizzie was being playful she pulled rose into her lap and raised an eyebrow " okay then I'm taking rose as my partner" and I got caught up and said " yes well I'm Scarlett's so you're already losing" and Scarlett pulled me closer into her and I smiled. I'd missed her hugs so much. But then I remembered why I was missing them in the first place. " nova?" Scarlett said and I pulled back from her. I wasn't smiling anymore I just looked at her and walked out of the room.

Scarlett's POV

" nova?" And she pulled back from me with such a sad look on her face. Fuck sake. I turned to Lizzie as she walked out and Lizzie stood with rose in her arms " me and rose are going to have a sleepover at mine" and rose smiled " you're having one with nova" rose said and I swear how have both my child had sleep overs with Lizzie and I haven't. I mean I have but not the way I wanted too. Not the point Scarlett.

I got roses bag ready and said goodbye. Now my house is quite and I looked up. I'm gonna have to speak to her now. Okay Scarlett you can do this. Talking about you're depression with you're child yeh  you can do that. No I fucking can't but I don't have a choice. I went upstairs and I knocked on her door " go away" omg her voice was raspy like she's crying. Fuck it. I opened the door and I saw her holding her phone. " I said go away."

Novas POV

I told her to go away why is she here. I was looking through my videos with her. And now she's good here walking towards me. Wait why is she walking towards me. " we have to talk" and I scoffed " you didn't wanna talk before" and she frowned " I know I was being a coward." And I nodded I mean she was. But where was this whole thing going is what I didn't know " I've missed so much time of being you're mother. I thought being in you're life as you're aunt would be enough. But it wasn't not even close. I seem to mess up a lot when it comes to you" and I looked down at my hands. She seemed to notice and pulled my hands it on hers. She lifted my head up slowly and wiped a tear that had fallen. " I erm went through a bad time after you were born" and I furrowed my eyebrows so she's really going to talk about it. I dunno if it ready. Scratch that I am ready. I just wanna move on.

" I'd stopped eating and sleeping. I even stopped taking care of you. You're dad and my mum had noticed but they thought nothing of it. But when you're dad had gone to film away in another state I got really bad. I just stopped leaving the house and cleaning. By the time he'd come back you were a mess. I hadn't moved unless it was to feed you. I did change you but not you're clothes. You hadn't had a bath I couldn't take care of you. All I wanted was to keep you safe. So when they took me to the hospital and the doctor told me they thought I had post natal depression The first thing I thought of was you."

I didn't know what to do. I just sat listing as she told me all of these things. I saw how vulnerable she was. She's got tears in her eyes and she's shaking. I held her hand tighter and she took a breath. " I erm I really didn't wanna give you up. It wasn't what I wanted to do but the doctor thought it was best for a little while. And then social services found out and well they'd suggest giving you for temporary care. They didn't let me give you to my mum or anyone I knew. And once I signed those papers I didn't realise they'd move you so far away. I did get better but when I was better you had a life. You called someone else mama and it killed me. I thought you were better of without me and I was scared if I did get you back I'd be robbing you of a good childhood." And I sighed it wasn't a good childhood. But I wanna let her finish  before I say that. " so why not tell me when I came back?" And that's  when the tears fell. She was trying to breathe but she was failing so I moved closer and she was counting. The same way she told me to calm myself when I'm struggling to breath.

" when I had rose I was terrified of it happening again. They put me on medication and well I was taking them. And when you came back I just saw my little monkey all grown. It didn't register to me that you were my baby. I saw how hard it was for yous nd you're dad and you would talk to me. I didn't wanna risk my relationship with you so I didn't. And as it went on the worse it all got. I  hurt you and I know that. And I'm truly  sorry baby that I kept it from you" and I let my unshed tears fall. " I told you how bad I wanted to have a mum and you didn't say anything Scarlett" and she pulled me closer to her " I know. Every time you did I almost told you but then you were so upset and I didn't wanna hurt you more then you were. Which I now realise I did either way." And I nodded all the fight I had in me was gone. " it wasn't a good childhood" is all I said and she looked at me really concerned " they were good people. They were taking something I don't know what because I was so young but when they died. They had taken something before hand I'd found the needles. The paramedics had seen them when they were pulling me out of the car. I heard them talking." I just wanted to cry. I was so scared and she pulled me into her lap and I snuggled into her. I nuzzled my face into her neck and she held me " I'm so sorry my baby" she was crying and so was I. We were both sobbing.

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1652 words wow.

Remember to drink water
Eat a full meal
Get a good sleep

My messages are always open

Till the next chapter my loves❣️