Malicious Romance

Chapter 99

"I miss you... I miss you so much... Do you even know... how devasted I felt when I did not get to see you... hear your voice... touch you... hug you... kiss you, and call your name? ...Giselle... Tell me... that you too... are feeling the same way."

Dean wondered if what he had said was wrong the minute that Giselle turned her head aside, making his nose barely brush against the skin of her ear lobe. He opened his eyes to look, only to catch a glimpse of her furrowing brows. His grip loosened its strength around her waist and neck unknowingly. The bile rose to his throat, forcing him to swallow hard in silence as he stared down at her.

Dean watched Giselle wiping her nose briefly at the same time that she tilted her head down to evade his surveillance. For a moment when he noticed her action of avoidance, he could feel his heart sink to the bottom of the ground and the ocean. It was about to break into pieces if only she was not standing there in front of him. Dean held himself composed as he removed his arms from her slowly, not understanding what he did wrong to make her sob suddenly.

I thought she enjoyed the kiss. I thought... she would miss me too. But why is she crying? Did I hurt her? Did I scare her? Or, was I being too rough without realizing it?

Dean brought both hands back to his side before he closed his right hand into a fist, digging his nails into the thick skin of his palm. It was hard for him to hold back all of the overwhelming emotions within his chest. He wanted to ask her so many puzzling questions. He wanted to interrogate her for what it was that made her cry. What was it about him and his actions that intimidated her? Which part of him that she didn't like? Because he swore he will try to cut and mask all of those unwanted behaviors out of her sight and will do anything just for her. In exchange for anything that could make her look him in the eyes and smile again, Dean was willing to risk it all.

As if she had noticed the bitter expression displayed on his face, she murmured, "I'm sorry."

Dean's fists uncurled unconsciously after hearing the soft tone of her voice. It was like a snap back to reality for him. The sound of it was more than soothing to his ears and mind. It brought more than just peace. It brought him back to himself and prevented him from losing himself any further.

She wiped the corner of her eyes while turning her face away from him. "This is not the right time, Dean."

That sentence pinched his heart. Does love have to wait for the right time? He wondered to himself. Is it so hard to say that you miss someone regardless of all the unfortunate circumstances? He bit his tongue knowing how pathetic and selfish one side of him sounded in his mind.

Dean gulped while holding his gaze at the silky black hair. "It's okay." He replied lowly, sounding sadder than anticipated. He chewed his bottom lip after hearing the tone of his voice. He sounded like a disappointing animal. He did not expect himself to sound like one, especially in front of Giselle. He wanted to be strong, but he could not even pass a simple test like now. Dean tightened his lips at the familiar taste of the unloving treatment, the dislike, and the despised. He was numbed to those repeating sentiments. At least the person behind these unwanted emotions was Giselle. He could take it from her only, and it will only be her who could hurt him from now on. Dean tried to force a smile on his lips, but it did not even last for a second as it faded into a straight line once again. Somehow, he felt upset. He knew he could wait longer until she gets better. But, regardless of those facts, he still could not help to overthink while the bitter taste lasted in his mouth.

He remained as Giselle turned to face him with her red eyes. "I... I just cannot... stop thinking about my father..."

Dean nodded in slow motion. The minute that she looked into his gaze, an encouraging smile formed by itself on his lips though it hides the disparity of his shattering heart. He was not sure why was it that when Giselle sees him, it would remind her of Richard Chu. Had she found out about the truth? Whatever it may be, did she have to bring her father up in the conversation between him and her? All he wanted was to hear her saying that she too misses him. Dean wondered if it was a different case for her. While he was living well every day waiting for her return, she was in that coma state of mind where time seemed to freeze. A blink of an eye for her would never be equal to all of the seconds that he had to count on not seeing her.