Chapter 23

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"Still thinking about her?" Nam snapped me out of my thoughts as I fully get back to reality.

We are current at Irin's place because we all agreed to have a dinner out on one of our places and it is the first time I joined them again after a long time.

"I can't help it Nam." I replied.

"Just get your head out over it Freen. Let's enjoy the night." She replied trying to lighten up the mood.

I sighed in anticipation as I tried to get my thoughts out of her but I can't.

I just couldn't.

"Nam, do you think Becky is happy?"  Nam paused for a minute before she stopped cutting off the onions turning her attention towards me.

"To be honest Freen. I guess she is. No not I guess. I know Becky is happy. I know that she already healed and I am also happy to know that she might be the happiest right now."

"Do you think she hates me?"

"Something like that."

"Do you think she already forgive me?"

"Forgiving is hard Freen. I've been there done that. But I know Becky don't hold grudges that long to people she cared the most. She might already have forgiven you, but you can't change the fact that everything is not gonna be the same anymore. Because sometimes we forgive to heal from the haunting of our past Freen, we forgive because we wanted to move on. And sometimes forgiving means burying the pain and the person who caused the scars."

I know it's a wishful thinking for me to ask if Becky forgiven me but that's all what I am trying to do every moving seconds. But I can't do anything about it. All of us are block and completely detached from her social media accounts, on Twitter, IG, Webo, on line chats. All of us were pushed aside, Becky also left our gc months after she flew back to England. And after that no one really knows how she is. Aside from Irin, she can still contact Becky but she is still block on her platforms. That's why it's so hard to try and reach her back.

"Wherever she is right now, I hope she knows I care about her and I wanna see her again. One. last time even if she don't want to see me. I don't care as long as I know she is okay, safe and sound. " I murmur.

Inside the four years of not seeing Becky, everything my mouth spoke is her and her all day that it annoys them already. But I can't do anything about it. I wanna see her again.

I wanna see her badly.

" Stop thinking about her. This is the first time you joined us again on night outs so let's just stop talking about Becky." Nam replied as she continued cutting onions.

I on the other hand remained statued on my sit as I tried to busy myself with stuffs trying to get rid of my thoughts that always wanders towards her.

"Hey you! Freen wanna join us?" Noey asked.

"Where?"

"We're gonna play something fun."

"No thanks. The last time you told me about something fun all of us played tennis on the beach. Who does that dude?"

"I swear this is fun this time."

"No thanks Noey, you go. I'll stay here."

"Gosh! Indoors as always. I don't know why but your not even with Becky anymore but your still living her traits." I saw how Nam glared at Noey as she gulp nervously before scraping her napes and smiled shepishly towards me.

"Sorry."she exclaimed.

"Speaking of Becky." Irin suddenly pop out of nowhere with excitement written on her face as she slowly giggled.

She look at us before smiling from ear to ear making all of us grew curious.

"What is it?" I asked.

Irin smiled again.

"Becky..."



















"She followed me on social again."

















:Short update for today guys, needed rest since I just got off from school. Goodnight.

:⁠-Petalpage

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