Stardust (Complete)

Before

I'd spent the time I had to wait going over in my mind what I wanted to say. I had so much I needed to tell her, but, then I saw her again, and I just went blank, like I did before.

I knew I'd been missing her, but I hadn't realised just how much I'd missed her until I was looking at her again.

She seemed different in her work clothes, her wild curls tied neatly back in a pony tail, instead of tumbling down freely over her shoulders, but, I almost smiled when I noticed the dreadlocks still there. She hadn't brushed them out. Maybe she was clinging onto the past couple of weeks as tightly as I was, after all.

"I wasn't sure I'd find you," I started, when it was obvious that she didn't know what to say, either.

"Yeah," she said awkwardly, "good job on that, by the way."

I nodded, trying to come up with something, anything.

"You wanna go for a drive, somewhere?"

"We probably don't need to have this conversation in the car park, I guess," she answered with a hesitant smile, and I lead her to the car.

I didn't know where I was taking her, but, we came across a small park full of trees and benches, so I parked there, and we walked together to one of the benches in the sun.

"So..."

"So," she answered.

"You said you didn't know how to tell me?" She nodded, biting her lip, thinking, I suppose.

"You know," I continued, tracing her fingers with my own, "you could have told me anything that was on your mind. I would have understood."

"I know," she answered.

"I knew you being there wasn't going to be forever," I offered, "but, then, you were just gone."

she was quiet for so long, just staring at the ground.

"It's hard for me, to get close to people," she explained, haltingly. "No one ever sticks around, and..."

She set her jaw, frowning at the grass by our feet, avoiding my gaze.

"I really like you, Kyra," she admitted, finally looking up at me. "Probably more than I should, considering we haven't known each other all that long. That's what I was worried about."

"That it wasn't mutual?" I guessed, and she nodded.

"Yeah," she glanced up again, then away. "Exactly."

"Ash," I sighed, risking putting my arm around her shoulders, relieved when she didn't tense up or pull away, "you know, I never held back with you."

"I know that now," she admitted. "God, I feel like a dumb ass."

"Good," I teased, grinning as she glanced up at me, "you should, if you thought I wouldn't give a shit when you were gone."

"I'm sorry," she murmured.

"It's okay, Ash." I drew her closer to me, and she came willingly, resting her head on my shoulder, slipping her own arm around my waist.  I closed my eyes, pretending we were back home again, and that everything was normal, how it was before.