WoF OC Reviews

Heatwave

AU?: Yep, otherwise that completely defeats the purpose of his crush(which is a dragon from one of my 8 fantribes)

Okay

Era: ok I did the math, He's 8yrs old when the dragonets of Destiny are now 16, and since in arc 1 they were 6, arc 2 probably took place a year after, so this is 9 years after the second arc

Yep! Okay, pretty good. Thanks for specifying — some would probably put "a little while after DoD" which is a bit vaguer than I'd prefer.

Name: Heatwave

Good name. Think I've seen it once before, but whatever

Age: 8

Okay

Gender: Male

Okay

Sexuality: Straight

Alright (I need to figure out more neutral words of acknowledgment-)

Tribe: Rain/Sand(Dominantly Rainwing since his mother was a rainwing)

Not how genetics work. But meh; it doesn't matter that much.

Other than that, I would love to know how that particular hybrid occurred, since, y'know, the rainforest and desert are all the way across the continent. But let's see anyway.

Leader: Queen Glory

Okay

Abilities: He can spit Rainwing venom; He has that barbed tail, so he has Sandwing venom too. He can change the colour of his scales, but he prefers not to, he has a huge problem with showing his emotions.

There are... a few things wrong with this.

First of all, it's pretty unlikely for half-sands to get a barbed tail, so I recommend removing that. The RainWing venom's okay, though.

Also, I recommend keeping them a solid color, and another thing: RainWings don't choose to show their emotions. It just kinda... happens. They can choose to change their colors, but sometimes their emotions show through their scales without them meaning to, so I don't understand that last sentence there.

Rank: not an Icewing

Uh... What?

No, wait. No.

I get that IceWings have a drastically different way to labeling which dragon has what rank, but you still need to add a rank.

For example, take the last OC I rated, Goshawk. She's a JMA teacher. Or Everglade, the one before that: a healer. What does your character do? "Rank" is essentially another way of saying "Occupation," I suppose, though occupation is a more limited term.

Appearance: I'll tag

Okay, so looking at the picture you've provided, Heatwave's appearance is pretty... bland. Especially since you've only given me the headshot of him, and I've got no idea what the body below looks like, and because you didn't include anything to describe that, I'm just going to assume that the rest of his body is as bland as the headshot.

Also, where on earth does the SandWing part of him come to play? Oh right... through the unrealistically given tail barb and nothing else. And maybe the horns, too, since those are clearly not RainWing horns.

Actually, thinking about it, I realize that the eyes are probably also a reference to the SandWing part of him. I get artistic creativity and all (I do it too with my SandWing drawings sometimes), but in case you weren't aware, SandWings don't have white pupils and slapping that onto your OC as a way to reference the SandWing part of him is... not good. If the only three (possibly four, if the horns are supposed to be SandWing horns) references to his hybridism are the name, unrealistic tail barb, and SandWing eye pupil color that isn't even canon, then I highly recommend altering his appearance (and additionally, his siblings, if I'm guessing correctly).