WoF OC Reviews

Duskwolf

Time Period: 5021 A.S

Oh, cool! A bit futuristic, I see

Name: Duskwolf

Oh. I understand you're trying to do a NightWing compound name (or at least, I'm pretty sure that's what you're aiming for), but that's not how NightWing compound names work.

They usually have something to do with the dragon's occupation, or personality, or appearance, or even just there to sound generally NightWing-y.

So unless your character... actually, I've got no idea how that name could fit into those categories, sorry.

The point is, that doesn't look like an actual NightWing name.

Age: 9 Years

Okay, cool

Gender: female

Alright

Sexuality: Straight

'Kay

Tribe: Icewing-Nightwing mix (I know very original)

It's overused and frankly, after what I've seen from the rest of the form, I'm unimpressed.

Abilities: usually very weak fire breath and ice breath (It feels like something warm/ cold is just gliding over the affected dragon unless it goes down the throat it shall not kill anything) Mind reading, slightly serrated claws

Well, for the weak fire/frost breath, I recommend you only keep ONE (firebreathing or frost breath), since the abilities aren't codominant and realistically, they would not combine into a singular ability.

And, oh boy, mind reading... Oh well, I guess. As long as you do it right. Can't say it's very original, though.

Edit: You didn't do it right. This is the only time you even mention mind reading.

rank: ? When in the Icewing territory she was in the 5th circle, (1 year 2 months old at the time)

5th- 5th circle?!

Duskwolf shouldn't be in the circles at all, considering she is a Night/Ice hybrid. I know it's been a few years, but a few years CAN'T wipe away 2000+ years of conflict. I know they did that spell thing, and that's cool and all, but it doesn't make sense for a Night/Ice hybrid to suddenly be okay. That conflict didn't wash away yet, and the IceWings would still be a very proud tribe.

Realistically, Duskwolf wouldn't even be allowed near the nobles, let alone being one and in the freakin' circles.

Appearance: She is a pure white near the front end of her body, which slowly fades to almost jet black at the end of her tail, she has bright green eyes, the underside of her belly is a light blue, she has what seems to be a million stars under her wings both black and white, she has purple and blue colored horns, with a notiable scar on her eye and a scar on her chest which is usually covered by a bandanna and a Skyfire necklace, in which her father gave her both when she was young.

SCREECHES IN DISMAY

I know it's futuristic, I get that, but it was A FEW SMALL COMETS and the island is REALLY BIG (someone actually calculated an estimated size of Pyrrhia, and it's very large). Do you really expect anyone to be able to find one of the possible 2 comets on a whole continent? I get what the comets can do can be common knowledge, but I don't think the location would be, considering only 2 dragons happened upon one when/after they fell and I don't think either would remember its specific location at all.