WoF OC Reviews

Ink

Time Period: Before the DOD are born, but all during their lifetime

Alright, makes sense

Name: Ink (Name Reasoning: His scales were the color of fresh ink on paper)

Well, the name isn't the most original, but most of all: this name makes no sense.

Remember, RainWings don't have scrolls, and therefore they don't have ink. I don't even think they know what ink is at all.

I think you should change it.

Age: Thirteen Years Old

Okay

Gender: Male

Okay

Sexuality: Straight

That's fine

Tribe: He is a full blooded NightWing, but he was raised by RainWings

Right

Queen: Queen Dazzling (formerly)

Queen Magnificent (formerly)

Queen Exquisite (formerly)

Queen Grandeur (formerly)

Queen Fruit Bat (formerly)

Queen Glory (currently)

I think you're forgetting Queen Splendor, but I'm not gonna take any points off for that (obviously)

Rank: Counselor at JMA

Ooo I like that

Abilities: Ink was born under the moons, but none of them were full, so his abilities include being able to breathe fire in large bursts. The higher his energy, the hotter his flames and the longer he can spit them. He has proven to be slightly fireproof, as he has set trees on fire many times and then seemed unaffected by the flames - receiving only minor burns. Ink is stealthy and can move through the shadows quickly and silently, making him good at camouflage games with his hatchmates despite not having their abilities.

Unique! The only thing is that he has set trees on fire many times — doesn't he live in the rainforest? Wouldn't so many RainWings have died from that? What about lasting damage? Wouldn't he have gotten kicked out?

Appearance: very large, well-muscled, pitch-black Male NightWing dragon with shadow-colored underscales on his face, neck, chest, stomach and tail. He also has shadow-colored wing membranes that darken to a charcoal toward the interior, and he has unusual dark navy blue underscales on the membranes as well. Ink stands at about the height of a slightly oversized NightWing, perhaps smaller, and his eyes are the color of smoke.

Cool. I like the detail. You did mention burn marks in the abilities section— even if they were slight, you should probably mention them here.

Backstory: Before he hatched, Ink's mother and father were scouting out the rainforest to see if they could find a place to leave it.

Because I find it slightly unlikely that both of them would betray the tribe so to speak, maybe you should change it so the mother was planning to keep the egg on the island and the father was like "no" and stole the egg without the mother's knowledge and took the egg to the rainforest, but he was about to be caught so he just sorta... dropped the egg somewhere. After a while, the RainWings found it and put it with the rest of the eggs, mistaking the slightly silver color of the egg for an odd variation of white (since RainWings have white eggs).

They ended up losing the egg in the rainforest and left without it, heartbroken.

It would explain this, too, since how would TWO adoring parents, willing to betray the whole tribe for this egg, lose the egg? It seems odd to me.