The Vampire Slayer Diaries

Beer Bad

Sitting at a table after class with Buffy, Willow and Xander. The girls were studying and I was using Xander as a sketch model. It felt nice to have time off from the hospital visits, no classes, just a day to relax. Medical school was no joke, so they gave us time off because eventually we wouldn't be able to. 

"Rough day?" Xander said holding up a lighter, waving it in Buffy's face. "Come on Buff, Be a lonely drunk. Rough day?" 

"Stop moving." I told him.

"Stop flicking at me." Buffy told him.

"Work with me here." Xander said. "I'm finally an essential part of your collegy life. No more looking down o n the townie. I'm the new bartender over at the pub. Got my lighter, my rag, my empathy face"

"Aren't you two young to be a bartender?" Willow asked.

"Oh contraire, Mon frere." Xander said.

"Mon frere means brother." I told him. "And stop moving."

"Mon girlfrere behold" Xander said holding up a fake ID. "Behold."

"I don't believe this is entirely on the up and up." Willow said.

"What gives it away?"

"Looking at it." I remarked smirking.

"Well no one's going to see it anyway. Now I'm the bartender. I kick people out" Xander said.

"You know there's more to it than wiping and kicking." I told him. "Mixing drinks for instance, my cousin Felix is a mastermind at drinks."

"Well I've seen cocktail." Xander said. "I can do the hippy-hippy shake."

"Well, even if I've had a pretend cigarette I couldn't tell you my pretend problems. The real ones have clogged up my head space." Buffy told him.

"ooh unload em right here baby" Xander said flicking his lighter again. " Rough day? You wanna talk about it? Shutting up now."

"I'm pregnant by my stepbrother who'd rather be with my best friend whose left me with no place to live. No food except this bottle of wild turkey which I drank all up." Willow said.

I looked at her confused.

"That was me being tanked and friendless for ya." Willow told Xander.

"Gets my Oscar nod." I told her.

"You know what?" Buffy said. "It's class time."

"So are you going to come by tonight to the pub?" Xander asked.

"Can't Oz. Bronze. Date" I told them. "We haven't had any time together because of my classes and the V club."

"You know maybe, maybe he's just having trouble dealing. I mean, don't guys sometimes put the girl they really, really like inside these deep little brain fantasy bubbles where everything's perfect? They do that right?" Buffy told us.

"how's that fugue state coming along." Xander asked.

"Parker" Willow said.

"Maybe I'm in his bubble and then pretty soon he's going to realize that he wants more than just bubble Buffy and he'll pop me out and we'll go to dinner and it could happen right?" Buffy said.

"Buffy as my best friend you need to stop thinking about Parker. He's a bad guy and I wish I could hit him" I told her earning a look. "There are men, better men  wherein the mind is stronger than the penis."

"Nothing can defeat the penis!" Xander yelled loudly a ton of kids stopped staring at us, making me glare at him. "Too loud, very unseemly."

"I mean I'm sorry to be so course" I said. "But if someone knew what he had done, you know the guy would be dead."