Striped Partner: A Jasper X Male Reader Novel

Chapter 26: Dead Leaves / Tigers, Pumas, Jaguars and Hyenas: Wrestling Mania?

This story starts with you sleeping comfortably with Jasper and Chloe by your side. Even though you've lost the ability to sleep long ago, you're still able to at least feel relaxed; the soft skin of your partner and your surrogate comforting as their arms were wrapped around you. All of you were in sheer bliss, all except.

Peridot: "I don't wanna slow dance...IN THE DARK~!!! DARK~! IN THE DARK~!!!! DARK~!"

Y/N: "*Sigh* (Goddammit.) So much for sleeping."

Jasper: "Ugh... She's been in the bathroom ever since we let her into the house. It's starting to piss me off."

Chloe: "Yeah, I'm sorta uncomfortable having to piss outside. Scared me half to death when I opened the lid this morning."

Y/N: "*Sigh* Good freakin' grief. Guess I'll have a talk to her about it."

-

Bathroom door

Y/N: "*Knock Knock, Opens door, Turns light on* Peridot?"

Peridot: "*Peeks through the toilet seat, Glum* What do you want this time?"

Y/N: "*Sigh* Peridot, it's past 2 at night. Can't ya just give it a rest 'til morning? Some people are tryna sleep, y'know."

Peridot: "*Glum* I just want to be with Lapis again. Is that too much to ask?"

Y/N: "Look, I know you're sad. But ya gotta cheer up! There's a lot more things productive in your existence than moping around in the toilet all day."

Peridot: "But it's comfy..."

Y/N: "I don't care! Geez. You've gotten yourself all dirty!"

Peridot: "So what? At least the dirt stains and the water inside gives me company."

Y/N: "That's not dirt, that's shit."

Peridot: "Huh?"

Y/N: "Yeah, the toilet's where humans relieve themselves. (In more ways than one. (Shut up, Red)) Where else do ya think humans take a shit, genius?"

Peridot: "Wha-! *Looks down* EWWWW! *Jumps out the toilet* That is disgusting!"

Y/N: "*Gags, Plugs up nose* Geez, you stink! You're gonna have to take a bath."

Peridot: "What on Earth is a bath?"

Y/N: "*Sigh* You gotta be kidding me."

-

After struggling to wash off Peridot for an hour in the bathtub, you couldn't sleep. You couldn't do much other than watch TV, so you turned it on and watched Camp Pining Hearts with Peridot.

Y/N: "Are you feeling any better?"

Peridot: "I guess... not really."

Y/N: "You smell a lot better, that's for sure."

Peridot: "Whatever... *Tears up* I miss the barn, I miss my garden, I miss Lapis... But I know they're not going to come back anytime soon, so what's the point?"

Y/N: "*Light bulb* That's it. Tomorrow, we're going to do some gardening."

Peridot: "You're joking, right? It's too late in the season to plant anything. Besides, I'd rather stay inside. Maybe let the darkness consume the pit where a human heart would be."

Y/N: "Is that so?" You paused the TV and walked over to your closet and grabbed a dimebag of seeds before walking back to the couch. "You sure you don't wanna grow this special strain of Uppercuts~?"

Peridot: "*Easily amused* Really?! No way! I heard that strain was already sold out!"

Y/N: "Yeah well, my old man has a habit of buying these, so he sent these to me last week in the mail. You wanna grow one?"