Everything to Me

22.

Lily looked apologetically at Sirius.

After a few seconds, he turned to Remus and muttered, "You should ask Amethyst out." And walked away.

"They are both doing this to each other." Lily sighed.

"It's been almost 2 months and he can't even look at her." Remus told her.

"Wow. That's a little too intense for Sirius Black." She shook her head. "I have to go and find Juli, I'll see you later."

"Sure. See if she changes her mind."

Lily ran towards the Hospital Wing while Remus went to find Amethyst. He didn't find her in the library or by the benches where they had first met. So he went to look for her in the Ravenclaw common room where he couldn't find her, either. Just as he was about to leave, he saw a few Ravenclaws coming his way.

"Hello, excuse me?" He brought their attention to him.

"Oh, hello." One of them replied politely.

"I am looking for Amethyst. Can you please tell me where she is or let her know when you see her?" He looked shy.

"Oh, Amethyst..." He seemed hesitant. "Well, she has been in her dorm since after the match."

"Can you please tell her I am here?"

"I think you should wait for tomorrow, Remus, if I remember correctly?"

"Yes, but is something wrong?" He was worried that she would say no or that she would say no because of his full moon problem.

"Yes yes." A girl replied. "You'll see her at dinner but it is better to have this conversation tomorrow." She smiled at him reassuringly.

He thought for a moment before saying, "Thank you." He smiled in response and went back to his common room.

* * * * *

"I am sure he'll be here soon." Peter comforted a worried James. "It is not unlike him to show up late for dinner."

"Yeah, everyone knows where he is." Juli shot back. She sounded spiteful and angry.

Lily spotted the temper in her voice and tried to change the subject, "So, Remus?" She asked. "Did you decide where you will meet her tomorrow?"

Everyone knew that 'her' meant Amethyst. Remus had talked to her before dinner and had come back with a huge smile and relief on his face. "Three broomsticks."

"Oh that's where Juli and I plan on going, too." Peter replied. Juli wanted to refuse right then and run away but she simply smiled at him.

"This is going to be so weird for me." James laughed.

"Yeah, well you hit on my best friend all the time!" Juli exclaimed.

"Because we are supposed to fall in love, Jules. It is meant to be!" He smirked.

Lily glared at him. "In your dream, Potters."

"Anyway," Remus started. "Let us focus on the good. Tomorrow is Halloween. What could go wrong?"

Juli couldn't help but think about Sirius. Sirius with some girl. She got up without a warning, earning a glare from her friends. "I am tired. I will see you back in the common room." Remus and Lily gave each other a sad, knowing look.

James waved at his sister but could sense something was wrong. Once she had left the great hall, he asked Lily, "Is everything alright with her?"

Lily looked at Remus briefly and answered, "She is just anxious about tomorrow." Which was not technically a lie.

James looked convinced and said to Peter, "Listen Wormtail, you are my best -"

"Wait, Worm what?" Lily interrupted.

"They are the nicknames we have for each other. Came up with 'em this afternoon." Remus told her. "Prongs for James, Padfoot for Sirius, we wanted to call him Snuggles but anyway, Wormtail for Peter and -"

"Moony for you." She completed his sentence. "I am surprised you didn't give one to Juli and she let you get away with it." She added with a laugh.

Remus looked embarrassed, "We just haven't thought of one for her yet."

"As I was saying," James said, "Wormy, you are my best friend but she is my sister. Don't hurt her. Not now, not ever."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

They all went back to eating but James kept glancing towards the doors, waiting for Sirius to enter with ruffled her and unkept robes.

After the dessert, Dumbledore got up and announced, "Enjoy your Halloween. Now off to bed."

James gave Remus a worried look. "I'll go and look for him. He has never taken so long."

Lily wasn't sure if Sirius would tell him what he was going through. James didn't even know that he was going through something. "Actually, do you mind if I do?"

James knew how close they were and how well they understood each other but he wanted to make sure that his best friend was okay. "Well, I want to talk to him."

"Trust me on this one, Potter?" She pleaded. She knew how much Sirius meant to him but he couldn't tell him that he was pining for his sister.

He knew not to question Lily's judgement. "Okay." He said softly.

"I got it. Don't worry." She left to say goodbye to Snape as the boys left for common room. She was not sure where to look for him.

She wanted to start with the Astronomy Tower but it would exhaust her if he was not there. She braced herself and climbed the stairs to reach the Astronomy tower but didn't find him there. She stopped for a second before going back down. She observed the sky and understood Juli's and Sirius' fascination with the night sky. The stars were beautiful and calming, like they had a mind of their own.

She looked down, trying to absorb the beauty when she saw ripples in the lake. Smiling to herself, she climbed down the stairs and went to the Black Lake.

She saw someone throwing pebbles into the water. She was about to say something when smoke filled her lungs and she started coughing. The figure instantly turned around and ran towards her. She was right, it was Sirius.

"Lily?" He asked. She was coughing non stop and was bent over slightly due to the pressure. He put his hand on her shoulder and dragged her away from the lake.

She finally felt her lungs clear and could breathe finally. "Were you smoking, Sirius?" She shouted. "Is that what I smell?' She pushed Sirius away lightly and marched towards the tree by the lake. She saw burnt out cigarettes at the base of the tree. Sirius walked over to her and she exclaimed, "How many did you have, Siri? You reek of them!"

"I... I heard they helped." He said.

"Oh, Sirius. They don't. You know they are harmful." Her voice softened. "Now let's do something about the smell and get you some food from the kitchen."

"But I am not hungry." He replied. He was glad that it was dark and Lily couldn't see his eyes brim with tears. She walked ahead and waited for Sirius to follow.

"Both the Potters will kill me if they know that you haven't eaten." She turned around. She saw him standing there and strode towards him.

He let that sink in. Both the Potters cared. That meant Juli did, too. Then why did she not show it? Why was she going on a date with someone who hurt her. This thought seemed to do it for him. Tears were now flowing down his cheeks.

Watching her best friend like this, Lily's eyes filled up, too. She pulled him into a hug. He was taller than her but felt comfortable enough to take things off his chest.

"I have never felt this way." He said.

"I know." She was rubbing his hair affectionately.

"Lils?"

"Yeah, Siri?"

"I... I think... I am in love with Juliette."

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