"Was it? 'Cause I know for a fact you also told her when you got back, and everytime you would, y/n would get 'confused' and then our relationship would get 'out-of-sync,' and if you ask me, I think it's because y/n liked you back" Elliot said.
Jake...
"So, again, your alibi is a mysterious stranger handed you the gun, made you put your prints on it, robbed the store and then hid the gun in your underpants" you said to a perp.
"Well, yeah, if you say it like that it don't sound believable" said the perp as Holt walked across the bullpen.
"Oh, hey, Captain. Did you get my report on the Finley murder?" asked Jake.
"Yes, I looked it over. Nice work" Holt said.
"Good. Thanks, Dad" said Jake, and everyone looked at him. "Why is everyone staring at me?"
Rosa answered. "You just called Captain Holt 'Dad.' You said 'Thanks, Dad.'"
"What? No, I didn't. I said 'Thanks, man'" Jake said.
"Do you see me as a father figure, Peralta?" asked Holt.
"No, if anything, I see you as a bother figure, 'cause you're always bothering me" Jake said.
Terry stood up. "Hey, show your father some respect."
"I didn't call him dad" said Jake, turning to look at Terry.
"No, no, no, no, Jacob. I take it as a compliment" Holt said.
"It's not a big deal. I called Vivian mom once, and she's my fiancee" said Charles.
"Guys, jump on that! Boyle has psycho-sexual issues" Jake said loudly.
"Old news. But you calling Holt 'Daddy' -" Amy said.
"Hey, 'Daddy' is not on the table here" said Jake.
"But, you did call him 'dad', dude" the perp said.
"You shut up. You've done nothing but lie since you got here" you said.
"All right, all right, I was lying about the holdup. But the dad thing, that happened" admitted the perp.
"Aha!" Jake said, standing up. "He admitted that his alibi was a lie. It was a trap, a part of my crazy, devious plan."
"I believe you" said Holt.
"Thank you" Jake said.
"Son. Do you want to talk about it later over a game of catch?" offered Holt.
"I'd like that" said Jake.
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"Thank you for all coming in on your day off. I know you'd all rather be at home, binge watching Media Content" said Holt.
"Oh! I just started the second season of Media Content. No spoilers" Jake said.
"But these evaluations are important" continued Holt.
"Sir, I think I speak for all of us..." Amy started to say.
