Petal [h.s.]

Chapter 74

Violet.

Harry and I were seated in Nicolas' office. It had been a little less than a week since I had visited him at Clarendale's for the first time, and I was back for our first joint therapy session on the sunny June-afternoon.

I shifted on the couch nervously, not sure what to expect from this. My shaking hand reached for the coffee mug on the table in front of me, as if my sipping coffee would ease the tension in the room.

"Now Violet, obviously this is your first therapy session with me. Harry here knows a little bit about how I work by now, and I want to stress that you can always tell me whenever something is uncomfortable or a topic is off-limits. I understand you... have gone through certain things that you might not want to talk about. Although I would urge you to do so, I can't force you to discuss those things."

I nodded at his words, letting out a sigh and resting my back against the couch as I felt Harry's eyes on the side of my face. I was wearing the floral orange dress that I wore when he visited the RSP on the family-lunch that Sunday. We were still sneaking around back then, and it was before everything went to hell.

Harry's eyes had lingered on my legs for a long time when I walked in, something that used to give me confidence but now only made me feel small. Did he notice the old scars on my knees? Did he notice how pale I was? Did he notice I hadn't shaved my legs in a few days?

"It's important to keep in mind why we are all here. We are all here for the same thing, and that is to make this work." He gestured to the two of us and Harry and I both nodded. Nicolas cleared his throat and continued. "Things might get messy. Both of you might say or do things that feel painful for the other, but please try to remember that this is a huge step forward in your relationship and we should take the little wins, okay?"

I couldn't help but feel like I was being scolded already. This felt so elaborate for such a short-term relationship. I knew I had agreed to this and that I did want to give it another shot, but why was it this difficult to be together with Harry? Why did we have to go through all this trouble just a few months into dating one another? 

I had never come across any other couple that did therapy after such a short period of time. Were we just fighting a running battle?

"Maybe we can start with a positive. Can you both tell me your favourite memory of each other?" Nicolas spoke and my brows raised in surprise, not expecting a question like that. My mind instantly flooded with happy times that I had shared with Harry, and an involuntary smile played on my lips.

I looked to my side to see him with the exact same facial expression, and we both burst out into a small chuckle upon seeing the other's face.

"Violet? You want to begin?" Nicolas gestured his hand to me and I nodded, popping my leg up over the other while my hands rested in my lap. "It's a happy memory even though it wasn't a good day. Do you remember when we were at the mansion and..." I hesitantly looked over to Nicolas, not sure to what extent he was aware of Harry's gang activities.

I decided to play it safe. "When the window broke? When I had been crying and throwing up and you were so calm and together while I was a complete mess?" I squinted my eyes at Harry, not sure if he would understand what I was hinting at.

He caught on and nodded. "Yes, I remember."

It was the night they had thrown the linen bag through the window that held the pink fingers and the photos of Harry and I.

I nodded and continued. "Well, we were just lying in bed and you were telling me jokes, and I just started laughing even though I had such a shit day. And they were bad jokes, but you still continued and it felt like such a caring thing coming from you. I knew you were doing that just for me, and it meant a lot that you were so collected and gentle with me that evening. And it's happened on other occasions too, like when I had... that throat infection." I uneasily glanced at Harry's face and he nodded, intently listening.