Chapter 32

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We arrived at the restaurant and were seated around a large round table. Just my luck I got to be seated next to Carlos. Go figure. I smiled politely and we exchanged some small talk. I had no intentions of ruining this night at all and I certainly would not be discussing anything with Carlos. At least I wouldn't discuss here. I would be nice and exchanged some details about my life but in the end I didn't want to divulge too much. He didn't deserve it.

The table exchanged light small talk with most people breaking off into their own private conversations. I had the pleasure of getting to listen in on a conversation between Charles and Lando about star signs and horoscopes. Charles looked most out of his depth but Lando was talking passionately. As I smiled and listened in I felt a hand graze me thigh.

I glanced down to see Carlos's hand hovering near me leg. My eyes immediately shot daggers at him "stop" I whispered and moved my leg away.

He smirked and moved his hand away returning it to his lap. Annoyed at this I decided to head to the bathroom to re-centre myself. I excused myself and headed toward the back of the restaurant. As I did so I felt a heavy presence following me. I looked behind and saw Carlos gaining on me.

I quickly wandered into the bathrooms slamming the door closed behind me. The audacity of this fucking man. I quickly used the loo and washed my hands checking my makeup in the mirror before heading back out.

I opened the door to the bathroom and found Carlos leaning against the wall in the dimly lit corridor. He had his hands in his pockets, head titled down looking at his shoes. I didn't bother saying anything and shuffled past him.

"Why are you ignoring me?" He asked. I turned around. He hadn't, still looking down at the floor.

"Excuse me?" I said crossing my arms

"You're ignoring me" he repeated turning around to look at me.

"I am not. I've made polite small talk all day. Quite frankly I don't have anymore to say to you nor do I think I owe you anything at all"

"Saffron I just want to talk" he said coming closer.

"What makes you think I want to talk to you" I spat in an uninterested tone.

"Because I know there is unfinished business between us"

"Well I don't know what you consider to be unfinished business but I've closed this chapter already"

"Please Saffron please talk to me"

"Carlos I am not talking to you about anything else. And certainly not here"

"Saffron please you don't understand-"

Cutting him off I walked closer to him so we were inches away from each others faces "do you really want to finish that sentence?"

He stared at me with a pained expression.

I scoffed. An annoyed and stern tone becoming apparent in my voice. I pushed my pointer finger into his chest "Don't you dare try and tell me how hard you've had it since you broke up with me. You have no idea the hell that I have been through since you left me. You have no idea the pain I experienced. And you're going to stand here and tell me that I don't understand. Well I'll tell you what Carlos, you give me a call when life doesn't turn out the way you want".

He stood there with the same expression, a single tear rolling down his cheek. It took everything in me not to crumple into a ball and comfort him.

"We are going to go back out there, slap a smile on our faces and pretend like this conversation didn't happen".

I dropped my hand, a sigh escaped my lips as I turned around and wandered back out to the table. I took a deep breath before letting it out and taking a seat. Carlos returned a minute or two later and immediately started speaking with Lando.

"Everything okay?" Lewis asked turning to me.

I nodded "mmhm" smiling at him.

The rest of the dinner was quiet. Carlos didn't speak to me at all but he did occasionally steal a few glances. Though he was smiling he looked unhappy. I felt bad. But I was not apologising for what was said. I tried not to make a scene and I certainly didn't want to say anything at dinner but he pushed me over the edge.

Dinner finished and a couple of the boys their partners wanted to stay out for a couple drinks. I declined and told Lewis I was super tired and wanting to head to bed. He triple checked and asked if I wanted to stay out but I didn't want to ruin the vibe. After all I was feeling quite shit after my moment with Carlos.

I said good by to everyone and wandered outside to order a taxi. As I stood waiting, I tossed up whether it would just be quicker to walk. As I was debating in my head a hand tapped me on my shoulder. I turned around before frowning.

"What do you want" I murmured under my breath.

"Can I at least see that you get back safely?" He sighed standing next to me but not looking at me.

"I can get there on my own" I said still not looking over at him.

"Saffron please. Just get in my car" he said in a demanding tone.

I rolled my eyes and scoffed before following him to his car. We climbed in the back as his security guard drove us back to the hotel. I stared out the window refusing to make eye contact or even speak to him.

As we arrived I thanked his security guard and walked into the lobby. Carlos jogged to catch up with me. We headed to the elevator and waited. As we walked in I scanned my card and pressed my level. The doors closed and he didn't press his level. No words were spoken though.

As the elevator doors opened on my level I got out and headed to my door. Carlos followed quickly behind. I unlocked it and pushed down the handle opening it slightly.

"Thanks for the lift" I mumbled before turning away and heading through the door.

"Saffron please" Carlos whined.

I sighed leaning my forehead against the door.

"You know I really didn't want to do this now" I said quietly still not looking at him.

"Saffron I've tried calling and the last time I did your friend Lottie picked up the phone".

"You've tried to call once Carlos. Once" I stared at him wanting to give up this fight already.

"I didn't know what to say to you. I just wanted to hear your voice"

"So you'll let me speak now huh? But not all those months ago when you broke me" I laughed "wow Carlos. Thank you so so so much for letting me speak to satisfy you. I am so glad we are having this conversation" I said sarcastically with a straight face.

"Please just let me explain"

"No. Now good night" I said pushing him away from the door.

"Please Saf"

"I said no"

"Saf"

"Good night Carlos" I said through gritted teeth, pushing the hotel door open and wandering in. I closed it swiftly behind me before sliding down the wall and onto the floor. My head was back against the wall and I squeezed me eyes together as tears threatened to fall.

What the fuck I thought to myself.

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