Career Driven Woman

Chapter 44

Lottie and El had already headed down to the bar to grab a spot.

El: he's here. Just grabbed a beer. We are on the other side of the room. Here if you need girly x

I locked my phone and but my thumbnail getting nervous as I approached the bar. I scanned the area and noticed El and Lottie. They pulled down their sunnies and nodded before going back to their conversation.  I stifled a laugh before my eyes went back to scanning and I saw him.

Ethan.

He was sat at a table over looking the water. His brown curly hair was tucked behind his ears, sunnies rested on his nose shading his emerald green eyes. He took a sip of his beer and I watched as his tongue gently glossed over his lips catching the excess foam.

Ethan was my first love. I had just turned 18 and was looking out at the world with fresh baby eyes. I had just starting stripping. We met out one night at a club. He charmed me and of course me being me and being fresh 18 and loving the attention of a man I ate him up.

Ethan was a 6'5, green eyes and brown curly hair. He was a gym bro, fit and toned, body hair sun bleached from the many weekends he spent either in the sun or at the beach. He worked in finance and counting although he hates the use of the term finance bro, he definitely is one.

My first love, my first learning experience, the second man I would ever have sex with. A man leaving me with some regrets and all new learning experiences.

I took a deep breath before wandering over. His gaze was now averted to me and he smiled standing up. He stood in front of the table, a big toothy grin gracing his face. He outstretched his arms. I returned the smile and gave him a small hug.

"Saffron" he smiled "I can't believe you came to be honest" he said grabbing a seat.

"I also can't believe I'm here" I said laughing nervously and pulling up a chair.

"I uh ordered you a wine I hope that's alright" he said pushing a white wine towards me.

I grabbed the glass "thanks" I said taking a sip and placing it back on the table looking down nervously. I cleared me throat.

"So how have you been?" He asked crossing his arms and leaning back on the chair.

"Uh I've been good. I've been good" I said nodding my heading smiling at him "how about you?"

"I've been good" he smiled and took a sip of his beer "I like your hair it's very short".

"Yep" I said nodding awkwardly.

"And you got more tattoos" he chuckled "I remember when we got together you were clean skinned and now look at you peppered with tattoos" he smiled.

"Yeah I guess we are matching now" I said as he pulled up the sleeves of his white business shirt revealing his toned arms, blonde hairs sticking out against his tanned skin.

"I guess so" he smiled a cheeky grin.

"So are we going to sit here and make awkward small talk or are you going to indulge me as to why we are here" I said grabbing my wine glass and swishing the wine watching it coat the rim before taking a sip and holding the glass to my chest.

He chuckled to himself "okay okay. I thought we might have a friendly conversation but the real reason why I asked you here is uh" he chuckled again "I want to know if you wanted to uh give me another chance?"

I cackled before shaking my head "I'm sorry" I said still laughing "what?" 

He frowned looking at me "I want to know if you will give me a second chance" he said taking his sunglasses off and resting them on top of his head using them as a headband to push his hair out of his face.

I looked at him dumbfounded "you do remember that you're the one who broke up with me"

"Yes yes I remember"

"And you do remember that you're the one who told me I would never amount to anything"

"Saffron I am aware of the horrid things I said"

"Yes yes. Blame it on your being drunk or high. Sure. But you can't drop the blame everything"

"Saff please"

"And you do remember that you're the one who left me because you wanted to go overseas and see the world and meet new people and find a cultured girl who be good for you" I scoffed rolling my eyes "well how did that work out for you".

I leaned back in my chair crossing my arms. I was angry and annoyed. I can't believe I agreed to come here.

"Saff I admit I fucked up. I fucked up majorly. Please" he practically begged.

"Ethan I think you need to do some soul searching and find yourself a one way ticket back to whatever hole you came out of"

Ouch. That remark ought to hurt.

"Sorry" I said as my face dropped.

"You shouldn't be the one apologising"

"I know" I said scoffing taking a large sip of my wine "I can't believe I'm apologising"

"I'm sorry Saffron" he said grabbing my hand.

I looked up at him.

"Really Saffron I am" he said squeezing my hand.

"I'm not taking you back Ethan"

"Why not"

"For many reasons Ethan but to name a few, you're arrogant, selfish, narcissistic, pig headed and an asshole"

He remained silent.

"Why I ever want to get back with you" I spat tears threatening to grace my cheeks.

"I don't know Saffron I thought of maybe I changed you'd might want me back"

"I'm sorry Ethan but it's a no from me"

"Surely there has to be more to your answer than that Saff"

I sighed "I'm seeing someone".

His face dropped.

I didn't want to tell him about Carlos. He didn't deserve to know about him.

I finished the last of my wine and cleared my throat.

"I uh" I stammered getting out of the chair I was seated in "I need to go I have dinner plans and um I'm running late". 

Ethan cleared his throat and stood up.

"It was good to see you E" I said quietly staring over at him.

"It was good to see you Saffron" he looked down at his shoes "I'm sorry for what I did and for how I treated you" pain striking his eyes. It was the first time he ever looked genuinely sad and sorry.

"Ethan"

He looked up at me.

"Thank you for the apology"

He smiled.

"I'll see you later E" I said walking off toward the front of the bar to the street.

"Bye Saff" he said holding a hand up.

I stopped at the front and turned to see him still staring, hands in the front pocket of his jeans.

I took one last look before leaving. As I stood on the side of the road I couldn't help but think about the conversation we just had. It was short but sharp. He apologised and I guess I should be thankful but I'm not. He was awful and certainly a first boyfriend not to forget.

"Saffron?" Lottie said waving a hand in front of my face "you okay?"