Do It For You

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By Emma

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Hey, I'm Emma. I'm 14 and I live in Utah, United States. I was born into the LDS (Mormon) religion. My father had served a mission, and my grandparents on both sides of the family had been sealed happily in the temple. I grew up my whole life thinking I would do the same. To serve a mission, to get married to a man, to stay a virgin until I was happily married, to get married in the temple, and to never ever break the law of chasity.

When I was coming to a close on my eighth grade year, I met a girl. We became best friends. Then we became closer than best friends. I hated myself for thinking this way about a girl, I was never supposed to be like this. Why am I liking a girl? This is ruining my plan! What am I doing? What are these strange feelings that I'm having? And why am I having them? When did this happen? Why am I like this?!

I fell into deep depression, confused. I didn't know why I was feeling this way. Then she texted me. Two weeks after I told her not to talk to me she did. My heart fluttered, and I opened the text. It was an invitation to hang out. I ran out of my room and begged my mom to drive me across town, and luckily she did. This girl, let's call her "Raquel", she mad a move on me, and I moved back...

Next thing I know, I'm proudly walking down the halls at school holding hands with Raquel. We were stared at, mocked, teased, bullied, the works. But when I got home, we were only friends. Best friends, mind you. But only that. We dated on and off, for 7 months. Until, one day, one dredful day, I found out Raquel cheated on me. But, that's not the moral of this story. Let's get back on track.

So what happened, is I told my mom. I told her I had a girlfriend, and she did not like it. At all. My stepmom was fine with it, my dad was... "Eh"... He was eh. But my friends were absolutely supportive. My new best friend, I'm not afraid to say her name, Hellen. I started developing feelings for her, but I didn't want it to end as badly as Raquel did. So I kept it to myself.

Anyways, the point of this is that you shouldnt't keep it to yourself. Just because you come from a background where it is not accepted, doesn't mean that you shouldn't have the right to choose. I'll tell the rest of my family... Eventually. For now, I'll keep it at baby steps. One family member at a time. Bisexuality, Lesbian, Gay, Pansexual, Gender Queer, Asexual, STRAIGHT, It's all fine. It's how you handle your sexuality. I still live at home, crushing on a girl, living with a mom who is adapting to me, living with the bulling and even with anxiety and depression.

When somebody loves someone else, it's fine no matter who it is. Love, is love. If you don't believe me, ask some of the most "emo" bands. Brendon Urie for example, He walks around with a rainbow flag on his back. He handed out different colored hearts for people to shine their flashlights through during Girls/Girls/Boys in his Death Of A Bachelor tour.

Fall Out Boy, they have said many times that you should love who you love. Pete Wentz has worn an LGBTQ+ flag before.

Being LGBTQ+ is NOT a crime. It is a way of life. If anyone I know is reading this, and didn't know, suprise. But please, I'm not trying to pressure anyone, but IF, and only if, you are ready, come out. walk out of that sad, dark, deep closet. Come out proudly with rainbow sparkles and unicorns burting out with you, whatever you need. Just don't keep it concealed just to not embarass yourself. Do it for you. Not for me, not for your parents, not for your aunts, not for your uncles, not for your best friend, for you. Do it for you. <3

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