My Deepest Thoughts

I am all I've got

Nobody is there to wipe your tears
So you wipe your own tears
Nobody is there to save you
So you just have to save yourself
You are all that you have
And all you can trust
People always change
Because there is two sides to every human
And it is difficult to hide the bad side
And only show the side that you want to be seen

I have to keep reminding myself
"Don't trust anybody"
I have think about the negative
While thinking about the positive
I have to let myself know
"People change"
And I didn't want to learn that the hard way
  They will tell you they love you
But the other side of them, the darker side of them
Have nothing but hatred for you
They will assure you they care
But the side they want to hide
know that they only know you exist when you are there
I keep telling myself
They will promise that you can trust them
And they will trick you into believing them
They will force you to trust them
But the real them that they do not like
Know that their promises means nothing to them
And they want nothing to do with your trust but to break it.

I will keep reminding myself
That I am all I have got
And the people I call friends
Are just hanging out with me so they won't feel lonely
But I still feel alone.... Even when I am with them
I have to keep telling myself
That the people I say are my friends
Will leave and turn their back on me someday
And it might not be their fault
It is just the human nature

So please understand
When I say I don't want to trust anybody
It is because I am scared of betrayal
Know that when I say I don't love anybody
It is because my heart is fragile
If I ever say I don't care
Know it is because I care too much and it hurts
Know that when I say I want to be left alone
It is because I already feel lonely
And I am scared of being around strangers
Because that is what you are
And it might not be your intention
But I will push you away before you can hurt me
Because I am scared of getting hurt.