My Deepest Thoughts

WHAT I AM

Beautiful smile on a beautiful face
Saddened mind in a sorrowful soul
Broken heart mixed with broken trust
Is this who you choose to love?
Is this who you want to love?
Cuz this is who I am
This is all I have got
Nothing, is what I can give
Pity is what I don't want
A sorry life is what I wont live
But that is all you can offer

Darkened life that has seen it all
Deepened heart that has learnt not to love
Strengthened mind that has learnt how to do it all alone
Because myself is all I need
You help is all you can give
But I won't accept
Because I have to be strong
Your promise is all you have to offer
But it is everything I don't want
Because it can be broken
My care is what you can't have
My trust is what I can't give
My love is what I don't own
Because how can I love you if I can't love myself?

Questions are all you will ask
Lies are all I can tell
Tears is what I shall hide
Because you can't know my weakness
A chance is what I won't give
I will wipe my tears myself
When I fall I will get back up
I will keep looking for the light even though it is dark

I will always have that beautiful smile even though its fake
The more I try the heavier it get to smile
But that is what I have to live with
And that is what I will work with
Because I have to be strong
Sadness is what I live with
It is always by side
But you won't see
I have to blind you with the smile
So you can't see.