Don't Hug Me I'm Scared {Billie Eilish}

{37}✔️

Dahlia's POV
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"You need to let me go or I'm going to scream," I growled, trying to twist my body away from her. "This is so not cool."

"I just need you to promise me you won't fucking run away or something, Dahlia, this is important! Look, I haven't talked to you since I told everyone and I...I'm only talking to you now because it's important!"

"Let me the fuck go and I'll give you two minutes!" I yelled. She shushed me and let me go, holding her hands up in surrender. I crossed my arms over my chest and glared at her. "What the fuck could be so god damn important that you had to fucking snatch me behind here while I was on my way to lunch? I'm hungry, and I want nothing to do with you!"

"I had to talk to you and I've been wanting to for a while now, but I've been scared...B-Billie is always around and I just—"

"Get to the fucking point."

"I'm sorry about everything! That's all I wanted to say. I know I can never even come close to making it up to you, I know you'll never forgive me, and I know it's selfish of me to be apologizing because obviously I'm only doing it for me because you don't care, but I'm sorry. What I did was beyond wrong, it was sick. Sharing that picture of you with everybody, telling everybody about your private life, having my friends jump you...I'm lucky I'm not in jail right now. I shouldn't have done any of that and I'm so sorry I did."

"Why the fuck did you do it?" I questioned angrily. "You put me through fucking hell all because I didn't wanna date you? Please, please tell me it was deeper than that because if you did all that just because I didn't wanna be your girlfriend I honestly am terrified of you."

"I did it because I'm jealous of you and of Billie. You're both fucking perfect, everyone loves you both...You both have everything I've ever wanted. You've got siblings that love you, you have your dad and she has both her parents, she's fucking rich, you're both gorgeous and funny and cool and...I've always just...I don't fucking know. Nobody really likes me all that much except for my few friends."

"I wonder why." I spat.

"Dahlia, I felt so lucky when I met you. You're so special and I really liked you, and when you agreed to hook up with me I couldn't believe it. I thought you were joking or something or doing it out of sympathy, but then I realized that you were actually into me! Physically at least. Nobody's ever showed me the kind of attention you did. I never had a boyfriend because I never wanted one and I never had a girlfriend because I was scared that whatever girl I liked would judge me or tell people about me...but I never had to worry about that with you. You were so fucking nice to everyone and I just felt like I could trust you, and that's why I asked you to get with me..." She sighed and sat down on the bleachers. I did the same.

"When we were together, you treated me like a queen. I know that it was just sex to you, and I know that we didn't hang out all that much when we weren't having sex, but you always made me feel so special whenever we were together. You were so nice and you would hug me and kiss me and make me feel like I was yours. The way you looked at me, the way you spoke to me, the way you treated me...I started to have deeper feelings for you and I kinda convinced myself that we were together in my head. I knew you didn't feel the same, but I kept telling myself that you would. That it was only a matter of time before you finally officially asked me out...And then Billie came along and suddenly all your attention was on her and she was coming on to you and then all of a sudden, you're telling me that you want her and not me. And in my head, it was like a whole break up and my heart was broken and it sucked because you didn't even care. It was nothing like that for you. It was just you telling me we couldn't fuck anymore and that was that. I couldn't think straight. It literally broke my heart and it made me hate myself and you and I kept questioning why I wasn't enough for you." She wiped away a few tears, sniffled and cleared her throat before continuing.