The Last HeartBeat

Chapter 17 Grind my Mind

Jake woke up again, coated in his own sweat, he had his alarm on to wake him up early so he could get to set, the talk with Logan and the appointment at the Doctor really rattled his nerves, it made everything feel so different, he only wanted his life to be normal again, he was scared to really admit to what was going on...To Jake, admitting he was sick was like quitting on his dream, like giving up, and where would he be without everything he worked for? Would he have the friends he came up with? What would be left if this illness was serious?

Jake went into the shower, he turned up some music rather loudly while he scrubbed his body, he wanted desperately to drown out the thoughts in his head, he didn't want to dwell on the negativity, he didn't want to feel scared of just living normally...Jake soon got out of the shower, the warm water leaving his bathroom steamy, he went to the mirror wiping away the fog left on it to see his reflection;darkness under his eyes, and his skin was looking a little paler then normal, he still looked muscular right then but after the Doctor visit he could tell the weight he was losing- especially when his bigger shirts actually looked floppy on him.

Jake sighed starting to brush his teeth, he wished something would work, the pills helped make the symptoms dull, but he still felt fatigued overall, he even found himself leaning on the sink for support, Jake sniffled after he spit of the toothpaste remains mixed with his spit he automatically shuddered at the sniffle, his body reacted badly due to the fear of bleeding from the cold like symptoms.

Jake sniffled again feeling a sneeze coming on, he dropped his toothbrush trying to keep from sneezing by holding his nose, his body lurched forwards as it tried to expell the sneeze, Jake let go of his nose sighing in relief thinking he'd stopped the sneeze...only to be attacked again, he wasn't able to catch it this time his body lurching forward as he sneezed splattering the mirror in front of him, he was attacked right after the first, sneezing again this time splattering small blood spots along with the spit and snot from the movement.

Jake groaned out as he grabbed some tissues wiping his nose and mirror, *I can't do this today* Jake thought, he sloppily ran his hair gel through his hair after getting dressed, his mind strictly on his doctors appointment cause of the way he felt.

As soon as Jake stepped out of his room he could hear his roommates downstairs screaming and laughing as they filmed, Jake groaned inwardly, normally he loved to join in on the fun, but right now it gave him a headache, it really hurt his heart knowing he couldn't enjoy this beautiful team he created...

"JAKE!" Chance shouted as Jake entered the main room, "Yo! You're up bro!" Anthony said grinning, "Why are you two up?" Jake questioned with a sarcastic snort, "Filming bro" Anthony answered, "Chance and Anthony! Like and subscribe!" Chance said smiling, "Wow, I'm proud" Jake said still looking shocked, "Want some breakfast?" Tessa asked from the kitchen, she sat amongst bagels, coffee and egg whites her and Erika had prepared.

"Sure of course!" Jake said, while in his head he was scared that he was going to vomit again, he knew his Doctor said he had to try so he wouldn't lose more weight, and hopefully get his strength back, but still...
Jake sat between Tessa and Erika, while Chance and Anthony were running around filming with Kade, Nick was in the corner complaining at them being too loud, and Justin Roberts was just watching from the wall, hoping to not be dragged in and called a freshman.

"Jake" Erika said while putting honey on her bagel, "Yeah" Jake said taking a small bite of his cinnamon raisin bagel, "Are you okay?" Erika asked looking at him squinting her eyes, "I'm good" Jake muttered choking down the small bite of bagel with a big gulp of water, Tessa looked at them, tilting her head to the side, her curly locks falling to one side, while she had a puzzled look on her face holding a bagel in her mouth while listening.

"You look a little pale" Erika said taking Jake in, looking him up and down, he wasn't running down the stairs, he didn't get right to filming or even try to be in Chance and Anthony's video, or prank anyone, he just seemed off, like Jake, but low energy, which shouldn't be considered normal Jake Paul at all...

Erika reached over feeling Jake's forehead starling him a bit, regardless of last night's sweating Jake's forehead now felt cold, which shocked Erika, she frowned pulling her hand back, "Why are you cold?" She asked, her question was full of concern but she still sounded stern, "Cold? Jake it's summer!" Tessa said giggling, "I'm not cold" Jake said laughing a bit, Erika gave him a serious expression making him look away from her, Erika was a lot more attentive with those sort of things, she was the "Team ten mom" after all, she was on to him, and wanted more information.

"Jake, can we talk in the office?" Erika asked, "No, I'm gonna be late for work" Jake quickly said getting up from the table finishing off his bagel and grabbing a water bottle, Erika grabbed his hand before he got too far, "We'll talk later" Erika told him keeping the eye contact briefly before letting him go.

"Bye Jake!" Tessa said waving, Jake did a weak wave at her before leaving out, he kept his head down as he got into his car, trying to avoid the fans, he was going through a lot, and didn't feel like signing anything or taking any pictures, Jake pulled down the road a little before grabbing bottle of water he took his pill for nutrition and iron, hoping it would counteract his slightly pale cold skin and fatigue, he gulped down the pills with the water, sighing before getting ready to start back up his car and head to work, but his phone chimed showing he got a text.

Logan: Hey bro, you up?

Jake smiled a little, he wished this wasn't what brought him and Logan together, but he was happy they were actually talking without fighting online.

Jake: I'm on my way to work, what's up?

Logan: Work?! 👀

Jake: Yeah, why?

Logan: Jake... Take care of yourself bro, you shouldn't be going.

Jake: Logan, I can't quit my job...

Logan: Jake, you need to, you need to relax, look I get you wanting to grind, but, you gotta make the mature decision here bro.

Jake sat back in his chair staring at the text, it gave him a quivering feeling down in his stomach and heated his chest, he didn't like Logan of all people getting serious on him, was everything that bad? Should he be more worried?

Jake: Well, I can't just quit everything, it's gonna get everywhere, I've been screwing up, getting a lot of hate, and they haven't let me go yet, I can't just quit!

Logan: Jake, that's not important..

Jake: Yes it is, social media is half of my career, when people think Jake Paul they think: Stupid, I hate him and He's hardworking. That's it.

Logan rubbed his hand down his face, it hurt to see, but it was the truth, Jake wasn't stupid and he wasn't blind either he saw all the hate left of his posts, he knew about the news articles, no other social media influencers wanted to work with him or be near him, he knew it all...Just because he smiled on camera didn't mean he didn't know he was hated.

Logan: Jake, please just promise me to take it easy...

Jake: I'll do my best. now I gtg.

Logan sighed out, shoving his phone back in his pocket, he was frustrated and stressed out but over all he was concerned for his brother, he hadn't had the much emotion towards someone and had someone on his mind all the time before, and all that was really overwhelming him, he felt like he needed to be be with Jake 24/7 but he also didn't want to smother him, or make him feel like he couldn't do anything...All he could do now, was wait for the next checkup, either he would be better or his Doctor would finally say something to make him slow down.

*Are you really ready for Jake Paul to slow down though?* Logan got a terrifying thought.