Bad for You (GU #1)

forty-one

Forty-One: Only You

No one talked. Tahimik lang ang bawat isa habang nakatingin kung kanino. Na kay Drew pa rin ang tingin ko. Hindi ko alam kung gaano na katagal pero kasabay din n'un ang pagtigil ng paghinga ko. When I was able to breathe properly, I moved my gaze away from him and looked at Melissa who was now wearing a serious face. Sinadya kong hindi tingnan si Slade. Hindi ko kasi alam kung anong pwedeng maging reaksyon oras na magtama ang mga mata namin.

"Hi," bati ko kay Melissa, nilahad ko rin ang kamay. Tiningnan niya muna ito pansamantala saka inabot. "Nice to meet you."

Hindi ko na siya hinintay pang sumagot, agad ko nang binawi ang kamay saka inilipat kay Drew ang tingin at nagtanong, "Where's your restroom?"

He was about to answer when I saw Tyler move the girl from his lap, stood up and caught my attention. "C'mon, CN. I'll show you."

Tumango na lang ako at sumunod kay Tyler. I just needed to get out of here. Just for a moment. I needed to clear my head.

I was aware that Tyler wanted to say something but he was holding it back. And I was glad he did. Hindi ko pa kayang makarinig ng anuman.

Huminto si Tyler sa isang pintuan sa hallway tapos ay nilingon ako. "Dito."

I muttered a thank you to him and went inside. Pagkasara ko ng pintuan ay sumandal ako dito. Huminga ako nang malalim, pilit na pinakalma ang sarili. Naglaro na naman sa isipan ko ang sinabi ni Drew, paulit-ulit. Bumalik rin sa isipan ko nung unang pagkakataon na nakita ko si Melissa sa unit ni Slade. Ngayon alam ko na kung bakit ganoon ang mga yakap nila sa isa't isa. She was Slade's first love. I really didn't know what to feel about that. All I did know was that Slade didn't have anyone in his life now. Sinabi niyang ang huling beses na nagkaroon siya ng babae sa buhay niya ay yung gabing lumipat ako ng Montereal Place.

But Melissa. I saw the two of them together. And whatever relationship they did have right now seemed to be something deep. Napabuntong-hininga ako. Inisip kung hanggang ngayon ay ganoon pa rin ba ang nararamdaman ni Slade sa kanya. But then Slade's words played in my head, 'Yes, I don't do labels but when I said I like you, it's only you, Celestine and I mean it.'.

He said it was only me, but right now, my heart wasn't accepting it. I exhaled. My mind couldn't function well. Hindi ko talaga alam kung anong iisipin ko. But one thing was for sure, I needed to get answers from Slade. As soon as possible.

Umalis na ako sa pinto at humarap sa salamin. I checked my expression. I looked normal. I didn't even look affected. Good thing with so many years living with my grandparents, I've learned how to mask my true feelings. Sinuklay ko ang buhok at inunat ang suot na shirt. At nang naging normal na ang paghinga ko, lumabas na ako ng banyo.

Natigilan ako nang makita si Tyler, nakasandal sa pader na katapat ng pintuan ng banyo. Akala ko lang kasi ay kanina niya pa ako iniwan pero mukhang hinintay niya pa yata ako. At nakumpirma ko iyon nang magtaas siya ng tingin at agad na lumapit sa akin.

"CN," umpisa niya sabay kamot sa ulo. "Sorry about what Drew did."

Nagkunot ako ng noo. Hindi ko alam kung bakit niya yan sinasabi sa akin ngayon at hindi ko rin alam kung para saan ang sorry niya. "You don't need to say sorry, Tyler. If that was the truth, then it's all fine. Siguro nga dapat kong malaman ang tungkol doon."

Napailing siya. "No, hindi mo naiintindihan. We always do it. Well, did," napahinto siya at tiningnan lang ako. Nang hindi ako nagsalita at tinapatan lang ang tingin niya ay napabuntong-hininga siya. "Hindi ko alam kung ako ang dapat magsabi sa'yo nito, so I'll just let Slade tell you everything. But don't mind what Drew said. Well, it's true pero matagal nang tapos iyon. Remember what I've told you the last time we were at the mall? That girl who didn't like Slade back? Yung naging reason why his heart got broken? It's Mel. But they're just good friends now, I assure you."