Claiming Lucian (Let there be light and Let there be Darkness) Yaoi Book 1 and 2

27: Bastard Child

It was broad daylight when we infiltrated the Bête Noire field and from the looks of the darkening skies, we had been in the field for a considerable amount of time. I had Caleb shut his eyes the whole way out because his vision would only open more opportunities for the field to play tricks on him. He was extremely jittery and he would jolt in trepidation from the things he would hear that I couldn't perceive.

His hands gripped tightly around my arm while entrusting me our future of getting out of this grassy labyrinth. Of course it was only right for him to entrust me with this great responsibility. I was the master of directions and the Lord of intuition.

We will not get lost I assure it. 

Caleb made another leap accompanied by a scream before pulling me in for an embrace. Asphyxiation will surely be the death of me.  

"Ca-can't do this...I'm so scared..." he wept and sniffed through his clogged nose.

 The werewolf had been clinging to me ever since we pushed our way through the meadow. His  body heat was causing me to bathe in my own sweat.

"Please bear with it for a bit more. We are getting closer."

I believe.

I was never good in consoling someone. If anything, I had more potential in heaving down their self-esteem and crushing whatever dreams they had for the future of their grandchildren. Lucius was the son blessed with the talent to inspire people and to bring out their best qualities, while I was the son accursed with the power to shut people out and to shut them out for good. 

It was nothing of personal issues with the person of interest. It just came natural with my tongue. It was my fluency. 

I did not mean it.

Honest. 

I swear on Lettice's life that was perhaps non-existent now. Who knows. 

While I slowly guided Caleb's trembling form, a soft melody sounded in my mind. It was a melody from a song that I was quite familiar with when I was just a child, but ever since they stopped singing lullabies to me, the lyrics faded with time.

A humming began as I tried to remember how okaasan sang to me and how Lucius would take her place whenever she wasn't around. Their voices merged inside my head as a foreign feeling lingered in my chest.

Whenever I tried to reminisce my past the first things that would surface were the lamentable memories that I would much rather preferred to be blurred. But these memories come back to me as if they were happening all over again. They were indissoluble  stains that would never wash off. I will always see them even if I shut my eyes. 

I was an innocent child back then who dreamed with no end. I wanted to become as mighty as my otousan and as righteous as my oniisan. I would cry for the simplest of things and would get consoled with the greatest of gifts. I did not know evil or its existence. I did not know of what it could do to people and how it would transform such innocence into an impurity that could potentially hurt others too.

If the child Lucian and the current Lucian would meet, I was sure that the very first question that the child Lucian would ask would be:

"Why did I become you?"

Indeed, it was the same question I had asked myself ever since I realized that everything that transpired in the castle was an atrocity. Every principle that I had stood by throughout the years was erroneous.