I am a bad mother

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Saturday, 5th of December. Sarada is 2 years and nine months old.

"I wan' dada."

"No, dada is gone. He will be back in two weeks." she put the clothes back on her daughter and hung the towel. "If you keep asking for dada, I will start feeling offended. I know you love him but don't forget about your mom."

"I wan' park."

"You want to go to the park?"

Sarada nodded and she understood that she will throw a fit in the next five minutes if Sakura didn't give her what she wanted. She wasn't in the mood to deal with another mood swings of her daughter. She did not understand why Sarada was this way with her but calm with Sasuke. She was even more moody when her dad was away.

"Let's go then."

She brought her to the park that they always went to. As soon as they arrived, Sarada ran to the swing.

"Careful, don't fall!" she climbed on it and looked at Sakura.

"Mom, push me!"

"No I won't push you. You can fall and I don't want you to hurt yourself." Sarada pouted. "Don't give me that face young lady."

"Dada push me."

Sakura took a second to understand what she meant by that. "Dada pushed you?"

Her little head nodded fast and she understood that now she will have no reason not to push her. She walked to the swing and pushed it gently. Sarada threw her legs in the air and screamed with so much happiness that Sakura regretted all the times that she had told her no. Maybe Sasuke was right, maybe she needed to stop being so protective with her daughter.

"You hold the chains, Sarada."

She felt scared every time the swing came back down but her daughter seemed fine. She needed to learn to relax. Her mother instinct was strong with Sarada because of how fragile she was as a baby. Her little body that came out of her belly was imprinted in her brain and she had a hard time understanding that her daughter was fine now. Another part of her felt guilty for all the times that she wasn't around for her when her brain was acting up. She wanted to make up for that by being too careful now.

She played with Sarada in the park for another hour, trying to re-learn to trust her baby's abilities and strength. It was hard but she slowly started to realise that Sarada was fine and that she was stronger that she used to be.

After telling her to go home, her baby started to run towards her but bumped her head into a wall and fell on the ground. Sakura ran up to her but before she got there, Sarada lifted her head up and laughed. The pink hair kunoichi took a deep breath and calmed down.

"I'm glad to see that you're fine. What happened? Did you not see the wall?" Sarada shook her head and ran up to her mom. Her knees were irritated from the fall but other than that she was fine. She healed her knees quickly but she placed her on her hip with a laugh and kissed her temple gently. "I love you." she said reassured that Sarada was fine after her little fall.

"Love you mama!" Sarada passed one arm around her neck and chewed on the fingers on her other hand. Her saliva was drooling on her chin. Sakura passed her hand in her daughter's hair with a little laugh.

She couldn't even describe the love that she was feeling for her. It was something that she had never felt before, which seemed weird to her because she always thought than she could never love someone more than Sasuke, but there it was. The love that she had for her baby was different than the one she felt for Sasuke. She would give her life for the two of them, she would kill for them but her love for Sarada felt more full. It felt like it was coming from her, her soul and everything around them. Her love for Sasuke only came from her and her soul. She was connected to the two of them but her connection to Sarada was more raw. She didn't need to get to know her daughter to bond with her, it was instinctive where as her bond with Sasuke was growing over time and getting deeper.

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