Hidden Omega

Asking me once again if this is a road I know of Could that person

Taehyung was... content. He wasn't sure if he was ready to call himself happy, but he was content. Talking with Seokjin, Talking with Namjoon, and now talking with Jimin, did make him feel a little bit more secure in himself.

He didn't feel a little worse by the fact that everybody else seemed to come back to BTS magically 'fixed' or at least feeling better, but while Taehyung knew that he had value, that he mattered, he still couldn't with a straight face feel that he felt that he mattered as a beta.

Talking with Seokjin had helped, cause he knew how valuable Seokjin was to the pack. But Taehyung knew that he was different, he was still trying to find out what his place was, with Seventeen it had been easier, there were so many people that he still felt that he was important, there was always somebody ready to give him the attention he desperately craved, and he always felt needed in a way that it was harder to in BTS.

Taehyung loved them so much, he couldn't describe it. There were times when he wished that maybe he could just join the Seventeen pack, he knew they didn't love him that way, but that was okay. Then he remembered how much he loved BTS, he would see them, and he would think 'I don't know how to function if I am not with you.' he rather be useless with them, than not with them.

"Tae? You zoned out again," he had Jimin cuddled up in his arms, it was close to midnight, but neither of them had felt like sleeping, both having spend long and never-ending moments talking to each other. Apologies had flown from both sides, Taehyung had felt guilty for not realising that Jimin was struggling, and Jimin had apologised for not making sure Taehyung knew he was important.

"It's just a lot." the words were mumbled into Jimin's hair, Taehyung might not magically feel better, and yeah he knew that he mattered the least in his group, but at least he was back home. They weren't all gonna leave him, he would be okay as long as he had them.

"I know, I am happy to be back with you all, I am happy to be back home with you." Taehyung still had a hard time wrapping his brain around the idea of actually being back. He and Jimin had been so close when they were younger before they had presented, but after they had presented, a right had come between them, and Taehyung was not stupid he knew that yes it was partial that he couldn't relate and felt weird about Jimin changing more and more to be a person he couldn't recognise, that wasn't the man he loved, but also the fact that Jimin being an omega and Taehyung not being one... it hurt, his best friend had become what he himself had wanted.

He had been jaloused of Jimin, he hated admitting it, but that was the truth. He loved Jimin, but he had also wanted to be an omega, he was meant to be an omega; instead, he just got to see Jimin, be treated the way he had wanted to be treated. When he had first met Seventeen, he had felt the same about Jeonghan, but the older omega was having none of it, he had sat down Taehyung and just went 'okay let's talk this over!' And they had done that, Jeonghan's straight face and pulling no punches, and talked everything over with Taehyung, that was how the two had gotten to bond at first, and Seventeen had learned of Taehyung's past. Taehyung after that had that same conversation with every omega in Seventeen, and later with Taehyun as he joined the pack. Sitting down, talking about his issues and just chatting about everything was what had helped him not be jalouse of them. He had never had that conversation with Jimin, he had just... repressed it. They had a bit of that conversation that night, and he felt better. He still wished that he felt better about his subgender, but at least he felt better about being with Jimin. At least he felt like he wasn't a disappointment to Jimin specifically.

"I love you," Taehyung mumbled the words into Jimin hair, cause he did, he loved the man currently wrapped in his arms so much. Had there been moments where he thought, maybe it would be easier if he wasn't in love with BTS where he could even imagine not being with them, maybe it would be easier, but that wasn't the reality he lived in, the reality he lived in, even the idea of not being with BTS ruined him, it would leave him dry heaving in a corner, unable to wrap his head around it.