Why Am I In Charge?

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I sat reading over some paperwork from the last tournament, in my quiet and tidy apartment. Suddenly the phone rang so I sighed picking it up and putting it to my ear putting my paperwork down.

"Hello?"

"I need you to do me a favour" Her familiar voice asks, I shut my eyes a moment sighing

"What?" I asked

"I need a babysitter" "I am not a babysitter"

"Can you just... Please." she asks

"I am not a babysitter y/n"

"I'll give you twenty bucks"

"Sixty"

"Twenty five" "Fifty five" "Twenty five and when I get back I'll bring you dinner"

"... Deal" I sighed "Bring her over I'm home all day" I told her before hanging up the phone "Fuck" I sighed rubbing my eyes going to make myself a coffee, By the time I made it and manged to get about half of the little cup down there was a loud knock at my door so I sighed and went opening it

"Give me a hand you dick!" she complained so I went out and helped her bringing the pram down the stairs into my apartment, the little blue and white pram sat now perfectly in my living room full of blankets and little toys, y/n followed and shut the door getting her jacket off sorting though her huge bag. as she did I looked into the mess of blankets in the pram seeing the little blue dress and Y/H/C hair.

"Hello... Small Human"

"Have you forgotten her name?"

"No, I know her name" I complained "Harriet?" I began but y/n glared at me "Henrietta?" she still glared "Hecet-" "Lisa" she corrected

"Yes, right Lisa. Where did I get the idea she started with a H then?"

"No idea benny" she sighed putting her bag on the table "Bring my baby"

"Uhhh okay" I shrug picking little Lisa up by her arms pulling her up like a I would to help anyone up from a sitting position

"No!" she yelled taking her from me "You do not! pick a baby up like that benny!" she yelled

"Well I don't know?"

"I hate having to leave her with you" she sighed

"why are you leaving her with me anyway?"

"I have to pick up a late shift for Alice and my usual babysitter is busy, so ... its you or I take her to work with me"

"I think you'd be better taking her to work with you" I told her

"Benny watts do I need to remind you I'm a waitress in a strip club?"

"No, I just think she'd be better in the back room with the girls then here with me"

"... You might be right" she sighed "But you're in charge" she says handing me Lisa "Like this" she says making me hold her properly

"Why am I in charge?"

"Because you're my only option"

"Why am I in charge of the thing you pushed out of your virgina?"

"Because your a babysitter" "You birthed it you manage it" I told her to which she slapped my arm rather hard "OWww!"

"you're in charge Because I say so benny now you wanna shut up and listen so I can get to work?" she asks so I sighed and nodded "dippers, wet wipes, don't let her sit in one just because you don't wanna do it she'll get a rash, she should wanna nap so just let her sleep in her pram with her teddy bear, if she's hungry give her milk" she says putting a couple of bottles on the side "Use it sparingly it's all you've got for tonight" she says

"Can't I go out and buy more? it's just formula right?"

"No you can't"

"Why not?" "Its not formula"

"Oh... Oohh. Its uhh"

"Yes Benny its breast milk. your a big boy you can handle it" she says "Also put a shirt on"

"Why?

"Because you are caring for my baby put a shirt on" she warns "But a shirt on you whining little weasle"

"Fine, I'll do it in a minuet" I told her

"Don't kill my baby. I'll be back at One" she says kissing Lisa's head and tapping her nose making her giggle "don't kill my baby" she warns going to the door getting her jacket

"I won't kill your baby" I told her

"Fine, don't neglect my baby benny" she warns as she left, and the moment my door closed she started to whine and cough and before I could even think she started crying loudly

"Great... This is gonna be fun" I sighed putting her in her pram and getting a shirt on going and sitting at my table trying to get my work done over her crying "what!" I yelled and she stopped "what do you want!" she simply stuck out her arms so I sighed picking her up sitting Lisa on my leg as I worked "This is why I'm not a fucking babysitter"

"Fuck" she giggled

"ohh no...." I said "Y/n's gonna kill me"

"Fuck! fuck! fuck!" she giggled

"Ohh noo that was your first word wasn't it?"

"Fuck!"

"Ohh fuck" I sighed...

"I'm home!" y/n smiled as she got in the door

"Will you... sssshhhh!" I told her as I had just that moment got lisa into bed in her pram

"Sorry benny, have fun being a babysitter?"

"I wish to never babysit again" I told her

"Well, she's alive, and so are you. You did better then I thought you would" she smiled giving my cheek a kiss taking the things she had brought for dinner to the kitchen "How was she? really?"

"fine, just cries alot."

"she's a baby benny. They do that" she laughs

"I noticed"

"Maybe I should make you be my regular baby sitter?"

"Not on your life"

"You should spent more time with her you know?"

"I know, I'm just no good with kids. Its not that I don't wanna be around y/n I just... don't know and I don't wanna mess her up"

"You think I know anymore then you do?"

"True" I shrug "Ohh uhh on that note I may have uhh-" I began as I heard Lisa waking up from our talking

"Fuck!" she giggled and y/n looked like she wanted to kill me

"Did you teach her a word benny?"

"yes..."

"See. This shit. This is why I divorced you" she sighed going to gather her stuff

"You didn't divorce me"

"Yes I did" 

"No you didn't legally we weren't ever married"

"By las Vegas Law we where Mr and Mrs watts for a grand total of sixty four hours. We we're married. and then I divorced you"

"And then you found out you where pregnant"

"I did. Benny... If you wanna be a part of her life I have no issue with that. But for all intensive purposes, she's my baby. I got pregnant I dealt with it, and I birthed it. she's my baby you wanna be part of her life then ask. and read a fucking parenting book" she says pushing the pram to the door "See you around benny"

"See ya Y/n" I told her as she headed out the door "Wait!" I told her going after her helping her carry the pram up the stairs to the street picking lisa up and giving her a cuddle and a kiss "Bye bye lisa"

"Bye daddy" she smiled 

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