Scared Of Heights | Harry Edward Styles

33: The Reality

"I think my teacher hit on me today"

Yeah...even I was shocked I said that.

We'd finally finished Lolita and were looking a the context and subtopics and sexual assault was involved. Lavender and I sat next to each other now and decided to lowkey work together - we had to do separate work but we were going to meet up and work on our own projects sometimes!

Anyway...

Giovanni had recommended me a book when he saw me in the book shop the other week (They Both Die At The End) and I'd come to him at lunch time after lesson and told him I loved it and we had an in depth discussion about it but then his hand was on my thigh and he was saying stuff about us two getting a drink later so I gabbled something about being late for an appointment and dashed off.

"I mean I...I dunno if he genuinely was but..."
"Love, what happened?" Harrys voice grew concerned as he put his phone down and sat up.
"We were talking about this book he recommended me and...he...uh..."
"Take your time, I can listen for as long as you need me to" He replied kindly.
"He touched me...not on my coochie!" I yelped when Harrys eyes widened at the word 'touched'. "My thigh. And them he asked if I wanted to go for a drink"
"That's so fucking inappropriate. Not to mention unprofessional! Are you okay?"
"Yeah I think...It just...it was weird"
"God, I'm so sorry. You should tell someone...maybe campus security"
"Its fine, I don't wanna make a big deal out of it" I shrugged.

"Wh-He's your teacher, he shouldn't be doing that! Even if he wasn't your teacher it's still wrong to just put his hands on you!"
"Harry, it's fine. I'll probably forget about this tomorrow"
"I...your teacher...y-your teacher put his fucking hands on you a-and asked to go out with you a-and you wanna just leave it!?"
"Yeah, i wanna leave it! Got a problem with that!?" I snapped.
"Of course I do! You're letting him get away with it!"
"You're not a woman, you dont know what its like so shut your dumb bitch mouth!"

Too loud?

Harry was shocked at my tone but was opening his eyes.
"You're right" He said quietly. "I...I don't know what it's like"
"Yeah..." I didn't know how to respond but Harry was eager to learn.
"Tell me then"
"Huh?"
"Tell me what it's like. Go on" He seemed genuine about it so I decided to go on.

"Its...scary. It can happen anywhere. People even see it and say nothing. You're always blamed for it - your clothes, actions, make up...and the justice systems fucked. Like this girl...the judge held up her underwear in court and blamed her rape on her underwear. Just dont look at him, ignore it, take the compliment...its fucking bullshit. Its sad a-and horrible and...its awful. Its so awful Harry" I sighed.
"Wow" Harry was speechless. He didn't realise how fucked up it all was.
"Ironic how I have to do a presentation about sexual assault when my teacher did something inappropriate, huh?"
"Oh love I'm so sorry" The poor brunette pulled me into his arms and sniffled. "I love you so much"
"Thanks white boy" I replied.
"If that guy does anything to you again, let me know. I'll spin his fucking jaw"
"No you won't"
"Yes I will!"
"No, you wont" i said gently. "You're a kind person. And I love you too"

We stayed like that for a while before I pulled away and went to use the bathroom and when I returned Harry was sniffling.
"What's the matter?" I asked, sitting beside him.
"I cant imagine what it must be like...being silenced twenty four seven" He responded.
"Its tough but you get used to it" I shrugged.
"Has anything ever happened to you? O-other than this?"
"Yeah...cat calling, sexual harassment...got assaulted on the bus once too"
"What!? W-what happened?"
"It was my birthday and I was on my way home from town when a man got his dick out and started wanking while staring at me. Then when I went to get off the bus he followed me so I ran to another seat and hid from him"
"How old were you?"
"Fifteen"

Poor Harry was speechless. And he had that look on his face.
"Harry, y' don't need to protect me I'm fine"
"No but I do. I-i can't let this happen"
"Look it's really sweet that you care but you cant just...make my trauma go away. If you wanna help just...listen. Learn and be there for people. And if you see it happening, help. Like...maybe this girls being followed. Walk her to her car or maybe inform her"
"I will...wow" Harry was in shock from what I'd told him. "I'll always be here for you. And I'm so sorry for getting angry"
"It's okay. You were...just uneducated. Just...do better?" I shrugged.
"I will love. I promise"