Just Us - Wanda Maximoff x Fem!reader

Trust is Not Like Candy

"Yeah, I, uhm. I'm okay. I just had a moment yesterday and ended up tripping backwards against my kitchen counter." A bow my head, my socks becoming very interesting at this point.

"A moment? This also happened after you dropped me off?" She doesn't force me to look up at her, she simply grabs my hands that have picking at each of my fingernails and leads me over to the couch. "What sort of moment." 

I shrug my shoulders, my eyes darting from left to right. Dammit I have odd socks on. Red, blue, red, blue. Left, right, left, right. I see her bend down in front of me, one hand resting on my left knee that started bouncing by itself. Stupid left leg. The other comes to rest under my chin, lifting my head ever so slightly so my eyes can meet hers. She frowns a me slightly.

"Was it because of what happened between us?" Her voice cracking slightly with the idea of possibly causing me hurt.

"God no Wanda, nothing at all to do with what you and I did." My body slumps as I officially decide to tell the truth. "I got some news from a friend yesterday and got a little overwhelmed with like 1000 different emotions at once. I ended up having a panic attack. When he went to help me he touched me and I recoiled, it's a reaction I have...not sure why. But I pushed him off me while moving backwards, which is quite difficult during a panic attack I must say. And I have the black eye to prove it, because I tripped, fell, bang. Didn't black out though." 

Silence engulfed the room, I swallowed harshly not liking that she is not saying anything. Maybe I've said too much. I know some people have their own struggles or don't want to have to deal with someone who has panic attacks. I get it, they can be scary if you don't know what to do. I use to get them all the time with steph and she tried her best but it was difficult on her, I believe its what truly broke us. I look back down at my lap, the small coffee stain on the sweatpants now more interesting then the red-head in front of me.

"Thank you for telling me." My head shot up at her words.

"You asked what happened, and I'm not not going to tell you. It's embarrassing but I guess it happens, not recently though. Well until yesterday." Her thumbs started stroking my cheek while the other continued to hold my knee.

"No, I asked if it was caused by what we did. Not what actually caused it, but you told me anyway. So thank you." Her soft green eyes watch my face as a look of understanding fills it. She's right she didn't ask, so why did I tell her?

"But you would have asked anyway." She shrugs lightly.

"Maybe, but you could have still said no." 

"But I mean surely it's like a respect thing, no? I mean you tell me something then I'm obligated to tell you something when you ask." 

"Not unless your comfortable, which is what you tell me right?."

"Yeah, I guess."

"There is no guessing about it. You do. This whole weekend has been amazing because you have made sure I am comfortable with anything and everything we have done so far. So why can't you do that for yourself." I shrug, not really knowing how to answer.

"I don't know. I mean it's like if you open up to me about some of your past or something that's bothering you. Surely I have to do the same, isn't that what relationships are based on? That blind trust for one another?" 

"Oh dorogoy. Who told you that?" I perk up at the Russian nickname for sweetheart. "This isn't going to be how this one works. You can't just give someone all your trust straight away because it can cause so much hurt if they don't return it or when something at the beginning goes wrong. You can't spill all your demons at once."