Sisterly Advice

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I'm currently in the elevator heading up to my penthouse going over everything that's happened these past few days, now don't get me wrong it has been amazing and it was like me and Wanda were in our own little bubble. But it's also a little scary, what I'm feeling, that is. I mean I know I like her, I like spending time with her, I like cooking her blueberry pancakes and I like when she just holds onto me. She is such a koala honestly. It just happened so quickly. We have known each other for four days and it's like I've known her for four years, it's just so easy to be around her, talk to her or even just cuddle with one another. This is a completely different feeling to any of my ex's, that's slightly cliché and an overused term I know. 'I've never felt this way with anyone else' ew. I never thought I would be someone to say those words, but here we are.

What do you guys think? Is this all going too quickly? Am I just kidding myself?

Ding, the elevator slides open and I see my sister standing there with a smug smile on her face and eyebrow quirked. 

"Who are you talking to?" Her eyes scan the elevator for another presence.

"No one. Just myself." I shrug off her suspicious look making my way into my home. 

I will talk to you guys later about this...whoever you are.

"You're talking to yourself again. Everything alright?" Carol jumps over the back of the couch getting herself comfortable before ushering me over to join her.

"Yeah just thinking about the past four days." 

"Yeah the four days you've been practically MIA with this mysterious woman who you met, oh that's right four days ago. So how's that going for you?" She leans her side against the back of the sofa so she can see me better, I copy her position.

"I'm feeling so many things and I don't know how to organise and register them." I huff out frustrated that I can't organise anything in my head at the moment.

"Well what would Dr Raynor do?" Carol asks gently, she shuffles slightly closer to me so she can take my hands in hers to stop me picking at my fingernails. 

"She would say to choose the one that is the loudest, and talk about why it might be the loudest." 

"So what's the loudest one right now?" As soon as she asks the question an emotion I've been feeling since I met Wanda jumps to the front of my mind, and I don't like the emotion one bit. 

"Terrified." I whisper out, ashamed that I'm feeling it in any way shape or form.

"Why?" I shrug my shoulders. "That's not an answer." My sister points out. 

"I don't know, I just feel this fear, like deep down inside that if I get close...that...if I let her in….all the way in...that…" I don't want to say it, because if I say it, it will make it real.

"You're afraid to lose again." I bow my head at my sister's observations, if she wasn't military she would make a fine therapist. 

"No Im fucking petrified." I feel my eyes become glassy with tears.

"Why?" Carol tilts her head in question.

"What are you my therapist now?" I scoff, but also hate the way I said it.

"No I'm not. I mean I could get Dr Raynor on the phone if you want. How long has it been since you last saw her?" 

"We have our once a month appointment. Speaking to her Thursday."

"Okay that's good. So can I stop asking the questions and give you some sisterly advice."

"Please do." Carol moves so she is right next to me, wrapping her arm around my back pulling me close so I can rest my head on top of hers.

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